Paul Edwards❄🇹🇹

@mixtapeminimus1 And at the gas pump...make sure the next guy doesn't get a free fill-up on me.

@ArseGrammatica Okay...maybe not ideal to ever fully divulge. But, pillow talk is pillow talk.

@ArseGrammatica Wow...you are amazing!! I'll never hook up with your sister again!

What are some things you can say during sex and also maybe you should be less chatty during sex.

@kateburning In the vein of realism...Wanda made a construct out of her sadness...then realized that she was living a lie that brought down every one around her...and then let the construct go....and became stronger for the effort. Be strong, as good things are around every corner, K?

Wandavision is super unrealistic because if you could make a boyfriend out of sadness I wouldn’t still be single

@mariana057 Blue Monte Cristo

Who wants to play!! Purple Brie for me

So...I can forgive autocorrect for assuming I meant to say "duck"...but, come on...who says "ducking"?!? Autocorrect is just trolling us.

If Boy A loves Girl A, but Girl A loves Boy B, yet Boy B keeps telling Girl A that she should stay in a relationship with Boy A...and so Girl A decides to end things with Boy A, just so Boy B won't be able to insist on Boy A and Girl A staying together...who is at fault?

L'amour est comme le coucher du soleil ... les deux sont les plus brillants, avant de disparaître.

Hey, Joe...where young goin' with that g*n in your hand?

@JessicaChobot A very true statement. It may be the perfect game, as a whole, not just limited to its own franchise.

This sums things up nicely.

@MichaelKeene I mean...it's *nice* to actually see your recorded soul show up on-camera. But, most people are only gonna view at 1080p, yah?

Jesus. Titty-fucking. Christ.

@Laurie_March My wings...marinated in lemon pepper, then deep fried to crispy perfection, tossed in my signature buffalo/sirracha sauce, and then broiled (turning once) until the sauce is glazed on.

What’s your favorite super bowl food?

@Laurie_March Fried bologna, over-medium egg, on an everything bagel with a swirl of Sriracha.

What’s your favorite breakfast food?

Four delinquent kids (F17 M17 M18 F16) force a suicidal boy (M16) to write a snarky letter to the poor teacher (M37) who was working on his day off...after they get high and trash the school library. AITA?

@ZehraFazal I'll take "Things That Should Only Happen In Florida" for $500, Alex.

I just opened a cabinet to get a plate, and something sharply fluttered out, hit me in the chest, and fell to the floor. imagine, dear reader, if you will, my abject horror to discover what I can only describe as two cockroaches mating, cojoined butt to butt

@NYounker Saw this in theaters, years ago: Teenager on Raft : "what is that thing?!?" Frat Boy in Back of Theater : "it's a Hefty bag!" And just like that...not a scary movie. Well, up until the rape-y part, that let's the "hero" escape (almost). 80's were a weird time...

If you know...

@TitusNation I'm conflicted on this one...because according to the report, the initial stop was for an expired state safety sticker...but, he was also driving on a suspended license. In VA, that is generally an immediate arrest and impounded vehicle. 😕 So, not sure how to score this one.

@MichaelKeene So be it...fare thee well on your journey

@PauleyInDC Your logic is too late. Vitamix ordered. I'm finally joining a cult. Goodbye all.

Currently having a mental breakdown trying to find the right blender.