tickle paw

@PeterBleksley Cheeky train drink; nothing beats it 🍸

Call me what you will, but this is how I choose to start my drinking this weekend. In my defence, I am on a train with no toilets, and my bladder is very old..!

@ClownWorld If you can’t afford to pay your staff… Don’t run a business!

Thoughts?

@TrishHodkinson @SimonFoxWriter Hang on; isn’t that a lot more than Labour received in the last GE?

How dare he. How dare he make closer ties with the EU when 17.4 million people voted to leave those very said ties. HE CANNOT BE TRUSTED!!

@Tokin_Jester @MediaSOI I still think it’s a good idea, but then I’m still waiting for it 🤔

@MediaSOI Can you imagine ANYONE still thiniking brexit was a good idea?🤣🤣🤣

Starmer won’t call another referendum on the EU because he would lose and would have to resign

@ClarkeMicah @DailyMail Well, the majority of the world’s countries don’t do it.

It's clear from the last few days of babyish insults from clock-fiddlers that this is really a dispute between people who get up at 7.00 in the morning, and people who might get up at 10.00, or perhaps later. mol.im/a/15694043 via @DailyMail

@DurdenLeodad @Alexandr4Denman Came here to say just that; nearly £300 a g! Who makes this shit up 🤦🏻‍♂️

@Alexandr4Denman WTF are those numbers? Who the hell is paying £295.96 for a gram of cocaine? Not even in a jail in Saudi Arabia they charge that much

Security guard caught with £65,000 drugs stash jailed after police raid Mohammed Waheed, 23, has been jailed after officers uncovered a major stash of drugs and cash at his flat in Preston. Police found: 115g of cocaine worth £34,000+ Nearly 400g of cannabis Over £32,000 in cash Scales and a burner phone linked to dealing The former Fishergate Centre security guard admitted supplying Class A and B drugs and possessing criminal property. A judge said the amount of cash and drugs showed “significant involvement” in dealing, despite Waheed claiming he was struggling with addiction at the time. He has now been sentenced to 30 months in prison.

Someone posted this on Facebook...so true! Tax his land, Tax his bed, Tax the table At which he's fed. Tax his work, Tax his pay, He works for peanuts Anyway! Tax his cow, Tax his goat, Tax his pants, Tax his coat. Tax his tobacco, Tax his drink, Tax him if he Tries to think. Tax his car, Tax his gas, Find other ways To tax his ass. Tax all he has Then let him know That you won't be done Till he has no dough. When he screams and hollers; Then tax him some more, Tax him till He's good and sore. Then tax his coffin, Tax his grave, Tax the sod in Which he's laid. When he's gone, Do not relax, It's time to apply The inheritance tax. Accounts Receivable Tax Airline surcharge tax Airline Fuel Tax Airport Maintenance Tax Building Permit Tax Cigarette Tax Cooking Tax Corporate Income Tax Goods and Services Tax (GST) Death Tax Driving Permit Tax Environmental Tax (Fee) Excise Taxes Income Tax Fishing License Tax Food License Tax Petrol Tax (too much per litre) Gross Receipts Tax Health Tax Heating Tax Inheritance Tax Interest Tax Lighting Tax Liquor Tax Luxury Taxes Marriage License Tax Mortgage Tax Pension Tax Personal Income Tax Property Tax Poverty Tax Real Estate Tax Retail Sales Tax Service Charge Tax Telephone Tax Value Added Tax Vehicle License Registration Tax Vehicle Sales Tax Water Tax Tax (VAT) on Tax. And Now they want a blooming Carbon Tax! STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY? Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, & our nation was one of the most prosperous in the world... We had absolutely no national debt, had a large middle class,a huge manufacturing base, and Mum stayed home to raise the kids. What in the happened? Could it be the lying parasitic politicians wasting our money? Oh, and don't forget the relatively new bank charges.... And we all know what we think of Bankers. I hope this goes around the UK at least 1,000,000,000 times!!! YOU can help it get there!

@NoContextBrits White bread with real butter…

What are you adding to this?

@JayW132 I just don’t bother anymore and I’m probably healthier for all that.

A Mars Bar cost 28p in 2000. Today it's £1.05, and it's 18% smaller. Price up 275%. Size down 18%. Most people accept this as normal. It shouldn’t be.

@ronsterd89 Jerusalem artichokes. They go straight through me; I end up with an arsehole like a grazed knee dipped in lime juice…

What is your least favorite vegetable ?

@987paul321 @AmiriKing Then you’re both massive pricks…

@AmiriKing I agree with him, Your on a moving, uphill escalator- why can’t people wait 30-seconds to safety take their turn. 🤔

Why would you choose to be as insufferable as possible everywhere you go? What is the point of this?

@YesterdaysBrit1 I was 12 and we stayed on a farm in Suffolk that summer; what a time to have been alive.

It's 1976 and I'm 8 years old. It's that beautiful summer and the school holidays. I've made a makeshift tent in the garden from an old bed sheet and a few wooden poles. Dad has just finished his shift at the factory. He's worn out, but he comes into the garden to see my brother and me playing. We're eating cheese, tomato and salad cream sandwiches, made with Mothers Pride sliced bread, and drinking orange squash. The ice cream van will arrive at 4pm on the estate. Our garden is our world. All of the windows and doors are open in the house. The heat is stifling. Ladybirds roam free. Dad has fallen asleep on the sun bed. That tent would remain in place for weeks to come. These are childhood memories. We must hold on to them.

@JimmyCrabbyjim @wibblyteapot 🤦🏻‍♂️

@wibblyteapot How many know that for 3 years between 1968-1971 the clocks did NOT change? And even if they decide never to change to clocks again we would be on GMT. That is exactly what we have just changed to yesterday, I am all for NOT changing the clocks again. I welcome lighter nights.

Peter Hitchens is called a "fanatic" for wanting to address the clock change The state takes away one hour from everyone's lives, in the middle of the night, hoping no-one will notice one hour of jet lag, the next day body clock messed up Life is short, and every second counts people diddled into starting work one hour early, on the Monday morning, and people think that is normal I call that... insane

@r116440 Just had a lesson with my youngest about plotting a route with six fig grids 😁

IYKYK 🇦🇺 🇬🇧 🇺🇸

@BumbacComeback Refused to share his 8-ball with management 🤔

Do we know what Scott Mills did that the BBC felt the need to sack him? Sounds like there must've been something serious if he got fired.

@mariana057 The one in the shed…

Which wine pairs best with finding out my in-laws are staying a day longer than I thought??

@Be_like_yankee @luxemiaa Interaction and transaction completed when I purchased my ticket.

@luxemiaa People aren’t spreadsheets. A crying child, a stressed parent, a packed flight… now it becomes a human interaction, not just a transaction.

This girl on TikTok said: If I buy a window seat on a plane and your child is sitting in my seat when I get there, please don’t expect me to “let them have it” cause they’re crying. Get your child out my seat. You should have purchased a window seat for them. You can never make me feel bad for feeling entitled to the seat I purchased.

@IAnupamaa @realMaalouf I’m sure the dog find it offensive as well…

“One of the main problems in the countryside is dogs. Muslims don’t like dogs.” Liberal commentator complains the British countryside is racist and Muslims avoid going there because too many people walk their dogs, which are haram in Islam. These people are really insane.

@TheBishF1 Not my favourite colour if I’m honest but then I’d have mine in burnt orange metallic so I don’t think I should really be commenting 🤔

Spotted & snapped in Battersea, London, just now: absolutely not my cup of tea. It fact I think it’s gaudy & vulgar. What do you think?

@KingBobIIV @thecoastguy I remember that case 🤣🤣

There's a lot to unpack here...