Luke Bremerton

Not knowing the difference between stalactites and stalagmites... total deal breaker for me.

There's absolutely NOTHING wrong with a calculator wrist watch. Don't ever let anyone else convince you otherwise. Probably just jealous

The smell of fresh pencil shavings and the sweet sound of calculators buttons being smashed with vigor. I love the end of August

@LoganAnselmi you shouldn't be making that type of confession on Twitter. What if they find the body?

Internet Explorer is like that old relative who keeps showing up uninvited. Never dies, keeps getting more useless

Weight + acceleration / x number of idiotic refs = football

Floppy disks make for surprisingly good beer coasters

I bet those guys on the Mars curiosity team get so much tail

One day sporks are going to make a comeback. One day

@haneerthak oh, so you're saying that you are interested?

@HanEertHak are you hitting on me?

If your hip hop career isn't taking off in the real world, do you really think it'll succeed on Twitter? No I won't check out your myspace

"Type it in the Google" - doesn't solve all problems. grandma.

Taking it easy tonight. Might have a glass of wine and crack open a book on differential equations. Nothing too crazy

I wonder if there's a room full of Rubik's Cubes in heaven? Free from distractions. Unlimited time limit

I want to be the type of person a friend can depend on. The type of person who you could sub in during an intense game of Pac-Man

Renting a Prius doesn't impress the big wigs #FYI

I won't date a girl who hasn't memorized at least the first 9 digits of pi. You've got draw the line somewhere

@OdetoFunny it's rude that you have to ask

It's sad. You don't see many today saying I want to be a kinesthesiologist when I grow up.