Porygon

(Parody) (Real)

We get to play a game called "NFT bullshit or just the regular type of creatively bankrupt" at every award/reveal show from now on

Going through the drafts folder, which one of us wrote "Star Ocean 2 was like the Twins 1991 World Series: A Shining Beacon of Perfection in a Sea of Mediocrity" You are fired

They're remastering that one game you rented a from Hollywood Video a single time when you were in in middle school. Yes, that one.

the material conditions of this problem don't involve games at all. but what if *the vibes* are bad. our report.

What is your cancellable take whose animation can be ended early to launch a special attack

If you accept the idea that any loss of consciousness including sleep is effectively the same as death, real life becomes a roguelite with boundless possiblities

April 1 is upon us, and you know what that means: we get to learn which genres studios consider to be stupid jokes

Good news everyone we have right clicked and saved the Glover IP and it's ours now

Klonoa and Front Mission fans, you are safe now my sweet children

Porygon Media parent company GameButt LLC has purchased the rights to Bally Astrocade with our pull tabs winnings

In 2026 Wario64 will be tweeting deals on canned air and iodine pills for radiation

Bannned from Metaverse Walmart for going in there with a cat person avatar whose shaders run a Linux kernel on other peoples' GPUs

Me and the boys are using a 2005 version of Handbrake to convert Chris Nolan and Denis Villeneuve movies and watch them on 320x240 screens on Linux based retro handhelds by an abandoned gas station

INLAND EMPIRE: In retrospect, you wish the Harold Camping 2011 or Mayan Calendar 2012 apocalypse had been real. Those would have been more dignified times.

Saltybet declared early 10's world cultural heritage site

A) Obey orders B) Disobey

Fortnite does not have lore, you made that up