Kevin Abley

@Broncos I love the Bo-Caine

@Tyler_Polumbus I think you guys are trying to manufacture drama between Bo and Sean

Shot or not from Sean Payton to Bo Nix??

@StoolMintzy I love getting pedicures. Zero shame.

God bless this poor woman but gotta get feet right to run these miles

@AdamSchefter @hbtCHIEFS @BarstoolBigCat “Alright everybody, the bus to the Khaki Pants and Visor Emporium leaves in fifteen minutes!”

Annual NFL head coach photo from the league meeting in Phoenix: Cc: @BarstoolBigCat 📷 Mark Peterman/AP

@Kaztor_Troy @JoshuaDover Did not expect that to pop off like that lol. Even Joey Swoll got in on it 😆

@RealKevinAbley @JoshuaDover Epic ratio bro.

@Brady_H 45 minutes in the sauna is bonkers. I’m doing 20 plus whatever it takes to wait out anyone who went in before me

Recovery days are usually: Long walk to and from the gym + 30–45 minute sauna Not a “nothing day.”

@damintoell Partyin is not a crime

No, I don’t remember AOC saying Elon was addicted to ketamine. Can you show me?

@m_goes_distance You probably ate a seed oil somewhere along the way. RIP.

-be me -30 years old -doctor says I'm healthy -I don't trust him -spend $800 on bloodwork he didn't order -biological age comes back 39 -cry -find biohacker on twitter -spend $2,400 on supplements -biological age comes back 37 -panic again -find different biohacker on twitter -spend $400 on peptides from Ming Wang -biological age comes back 27 I don't know what's real anymore, but mr Wang does.

@realpeteyb123 My wife is Latina. She doesn’t understand how time works. I gotta be in charge of the morning routine.

@RealKevinAbley I have a wife for that. Sorry

Never look at your phone once you wake up. Ever!!! Journal instead. One of the best reasons to journal in the morning is to take control of your mind. Control your mental algorithm, and don’t let it be controlled by others. Write your goals, what you’re grateful for, and what you want to create that day. Gratitude breaks negative loops and kills anxiety and dread. Doomscrolling does the opposite. It pulls you into darker and darker thoughts until it owns you. After that, do 100 pushups, drink a glass of water, and make sure your eyes see the sun. Then, go for a walk, or do some cardio, or lift weights (I like to leave that for later) The rest of your day will be golden. Have your first cup of coffee 2 hours in. Do this for 30 days, and your entire life before this will be forgotten. You are welcome

@interesting_aIl That’s why I got my kids bone smashing hammers for Christmas

If Lionel Messi had perfect side profile

@jarvis_best Now tell us about that dream you had last night and your fantasy football team

This is so hot

@VicLombardi Higher paying AND competent coaching

Man, these former Buffs taking subtle shots at CU is downright disingenuous. Just say it. Higher-paying job. We all leave for higher-paying gigs. Happens all the time.

@GadSaad @ComicDaveSmith @joerogan Dave Smith: Professional Israel Arguer used to be a comedian apparently.

Dear @ComicDaveSmith, I'll engage with you here because you were apparently very upset on your most recent appearance on @joerogan's podcast. I don't engage with your positions because in a world of fixed resources, one does not have the time to engage with everyone in possession of an opinion. You've managed to catapult yourself onto the conversation; more power to you. Quantum physicists should not bother with my opinion on the topic since I readily admit that I'm hardly an expert in that field; I dare venture that my knowledge of quantum physics (very little) is orders of magnitude higher than your "knowledge" of Israel and the Middle East. I have epistemological humility; you possess none. Cheers.

@jarvis_best Sorry for partyin

Wait, three LITERS of vodka? How the hell is she even alive??

@stoolpresidente @BarstoolBigCat @tBushGaming I’m actually a lawyer. It’s illegal for foreigners to sue Americans. Post whatever you like.

You absolutely can’t make this up. Just got this text from our corporate lawyer. The most predictable thing ever from the morons @tBushGaming That’s what I get for paying for these fools to go to London.

@cool_man_van Fake Natty

nothing but fucking hard work and dedication. 5 years gym progress. no trick angles, no god lighting just blood sweat and tears. #achevment

@Chiefs @PatrickMahomes He's got them Angel Reese one legged pants on

QB1 back in the lab 👀 @PatrickMahomes

@jarvis_best Or just go with the tried and true posting of his profile pic without comment. Like imagine a dude who looks like this saying anything.

1. SHOOT THE MESSENGER. Guy who caught you in a lie wore a mask during Covid? Post a screenshot. Didn’t support your candidate? Point it out. Go on the attack IMMEDIATELY. It changes the subject and gets people focused on something other than your lie. Note: sometimes the person pointing out the lie is pretty clean, in which case wait for someone problematic to amplify the fact checkers post, and attack THAT guy. There’s always someone to attack.

🧵So you’re caught lying on X. Someone has put together a devastating thread pointing out that your argument is based on nothing but falsehoods. It’s over, right? WRONG. Do not give up. Follow these steps and you will come out even more popular than before. Starting with …

@IfindRetards Las Vegas Raiders Fan

End the debate. What's the word for someone who is both gay and retarded?