Tim Vine

Newcastle! I’ll be with you. May 7th 7.30pm Tyneside Cinema. tynesidecinema.co.uk/event/rocker-b…

@DeallieC 50 to 60 isn’t an alley. It’s a motorway. It is something like 47 to 52.

@RealTimVine According to Frank Skinner it’s between 50 to 60 years so I’ll go for that as I’d never heard that term before!

I was always told that sniper’s alley was about 47 to 54 and now if you Google it it’s 50 to 60 or even 40 to 70 which is essentially meaningless. The incorrect telling of it down the years has led to nonsense replacing the original Doctor’s observation. Welcome to the internet.

@SamTheLaw180 And I’ve just remembered you were chalking the semi final! You already know the result.

@RealTimVine You're being nice again Tim!! Next time. 😉🙌🏻

Not every day you get to play (and lose ill add) to a comedy legend like @RealTimVine. Unfortunately for him hes created a new rivalry.

Sir John Gielgud reciting my short poem: ‘We owe it all to mothers’.

@Thegnsalm Poss.

@RealTimVine Will you come to Edinburgh?

Newcastle! I’ll be with you. May 7th 7.30pm Tyneside Cinema. tynesidecinema.co.uk/event/rocker-b…

@JoeCarrStriker I think I still have Arthur but I gave the little piece of carpet away to a fan.

@RealTimVine Tim, what became of Arthur, the jewellery box?!

@DemonJim I liked it 😀

@RealTimVine Checkout comedy there. Tim got it, even if all you darts philistines didn't and thought I was just rudely suggesting he won't make it to 159. I'm not going to explain the joke, ask a pro darts player (or I wonder if Grok can explain it...)

@S_Y_W_Y_S Well there’s a lot of different ways. My plan was D12 Single 11 D12. But plans changed.

@RealTimVine How many takes?

@PeterJones27 Yes I am . 🙂

@RealTimVine 59 Tim

@realruthmaher Yes it is! Well done Ruth. I’m 59! X

@RealTimVine Is that how old you are today? Happy Birthday xxx

Comedy Night 26 was a dream! A huge thanks to our wonderful ambassador @AdamHillsComedy for hosting such a brilliant night once again – and to the incredible comedians who were so kind, generous and hilarious, including our very own alum @zaclammas @thisisjackdee & Luisa Omielan

@chrisshieldsmus Yeh I tweeted about it. Saw it at the IMAX last week. Brilliant.

@RealTimVine Have you seen this yet Tim? You've got to see it. You'll love it. X

@TheKopyKatz Yes she was.

@RealTimVine She was great in stay away jo with Elvis.

Last night I saw HIGH NOON at the Harold Pinter theatre. It’s one of my favourite films and this production of it is FANTASTIC. It’s only on until March 6th so get there while you can. It even inspired me to get my Katy Jurado Picture out of storage and give it a hug.

@TulsaLange It’s not one of my favourite ones of his although he looked at his absolute best and Katy Jurado is wonderful.

@RealTimVine Cor! We'll have to agree to disagree there, Tim. 'Stay Away, Joe' is a really underrated film. Elvis never gets the respect he deserves for his skills/timing as a comedic actor (let alone for his work in his 'serious' films).

@AlanConnor52144 No. Good?

@RealTimVine Have you seen "Outland"?

@TulsaLange That word ‘superb’ is doing a lot of heavy lifting 😄

@RealTimVine Loving that Katy Jurado photo. For me though, I'll always remember her best for being Elvis' co-star in the superb 'Stay Away, Joe'. ⚡️👍