Wingman

@DavePunton @coyknorth @dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker The symphony of test match cricket. As complex as splitting the atom, as simple as tying your shoes…

@coyknorth @RossWigham @dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker Draw?

@coyknorth @RossWigham @dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker How…..?

@DavePunton @coyknorth @dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker 50 to win new ball due weather

@coyknorth @DavePunton @dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker The curse of the Arnott tweet

@coyknorth @DavePunton @dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker Out

@dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker @coyknorth @DavePunton No spoilers or anything but the plot turns when the protagonist forgets his parking disc and is unable to leave creswell beach

@1HowardWalker @coyknorth @DavePunton @RossWigham Always a warm welcome

@DavePunton @coyknorth @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 so a normal Tuesday in Morpeth....

@DavePunton @coyknorth @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 The North East depicted as a distant beauty spot populated by rampaging, teeth gnashing monsters foaming at the mouth.....

@DavePunton @dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker @coyknorth Big ask…..it’s the hope that kills you

@RossWigham @dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker @coyknorth 371 to win. Hard. Can’t see it. Tongue late flurry kept it under 400

@dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker @DavePunton @coyknorth “Fill the bench with keepers and sign nobody” ancient Chinese proverb

@1HowardWalker @DavePunton @coyknorth @RossWigham "All warfare is based on deception..." - Wor Sun speaking after Howe's Friday media briefing

@coyknorth @DavePunton @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 Toothless in attack although ironically we do have a tongue

@RossWigham @DavePunton @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 No real cutting edge bowler. All high 70/low 80 mph medium fast plodders - no real movement - all line and length.

@DavePunton @coyknorth @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 Feels like we’re stacked with stock bowlers and not many attackers

@coyknorth @RossWigham @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 It’s middle road at best. Jury out on Carse. Tongue short. Woakes ageing.

@coyknorth @DavePunton @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 Very samey and missing the control of previous years

@DavePunton @RossWigham @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 Pretty mediocre. It’s all the same bowler, isn’t it?!

@coyknorth @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 @DavePunton Was just thinking why are they playing Gary Newman cars, the realised Carse was stepping up to bowl 🤣

@1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 @RossWigham @DavePunton Bumrah some boy.

@coyknorth @1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 @DavePunton There was a paper shop right outside our school that just have made a fortune out of singles. Sold to kids in school uniform. Glory days

@1HowardWalker @dancingbear76 @RossWigham @DavePunton Tabs handed to bairns willingly. Every young un was on Silk Cuts by the time they were nine.

@coyknorth @dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker @DavePunton 40 lambert and butler and a rocket lolly

@dancingbear76 @1HowardWalker @RossWigham @DavePunton 😂😂 20 Regal king size, a Fab and a Zoom mate.

@1HowardWalker @coyknorth @dancingbear76 @DavePunton Green sleeves or Yankee Doodle

@coyknorth @dancingbear76 @RossWigham @DavePunton So, what do we think is the archetypal ice cream van tune? For some reason, the Popeye The Sailor Man tune was popular when I was growing up. Must give the ghost of Henry VIII a stab of pride every time he hears the tune he composed for one of the wives he killed send kids crazy

@dancingbear76 @coyknorth @1HowardWalker @DavePunton I remember the ice cream van would come around at about 8pm every night and most of the adults were buying tabs.

@coyknorth @1HowardWalker @RossWigham @DavePunton Haha, like pavlov’s dogs - pure reflex action. I’m the same. If they played a tinkly-pinkly Dr Zhivago theme tune and parked a Mr Whippy Ford Transit and at the 100m finish line, we’d beat Usain Bolt to the podium!

@DavePunton @dancingbear76 @coyknorth @1HowardWalker As the Buddha tells us “Pain is certain, suffering is optional” for Dave it’s mandatory

@dancingbear76 @coyknorth @1HowardWalker @RossWigham Harry out to Krishna, btw

@1HowardWalker @coyknorth @dancingbear76 @DavePunton Another modern cricket nonsense = calling the umpire by first name.

@coyknorth @RossWigham @dancingbear76 @DavePunton Makes it extremely easy for the opposition when they know how you’re going to play. Not seen that last wicket but reading about it on BBC Sport it sounds like a classic example of falling for an obvious ploy because you’re attacking all the time