Sam Sharpe

I think it's finally happened and the third-party client I use has been locked out. That probably means I will only check in here very infrequently. Find me on Mastodon via my contact page: samsharpe.net/contact/

@sophaskins One of those wasn't the first Bobby Sands to be elected to high office. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bobby_San…

@cybergibbons Technically you only need the recovery position when they have a heartbeat and they are not totally conscious, so I don't think your specific experience shapes the training.

Is teaching the recovery position a distraction in first aid? I've only ever dealt with people who have no heartbeat or are totally conscious and have badly broken things

@ajlanghorn (-_-) you are dead to me

@ajlanghorn #acceptable. I hope you got Avios.

@ajlanghorn Cuba or Haiti for supper? Also WTF is dinner - do you mean Tea?

My response to recruiters looking for people to work in AI startups: ---- No. You are killing the planet. I would need a salary 10x market (at least) to override my own sense of morality. Best of luck in your search! Sam

@cybergibbons Because most of the UK doesn't follow argumentative twats on Youtube. I'm not saying they shouldn't be doing it, I'm not saying our rights aren't important, but a lot of these "Auditors" relish the confrontation, because it drives views and revenue. Youtube is a cancer.

How are businesses not aware of the law by now? There are at least ten full time "auditors" in the UK now. If you don't want people filming your business, put up barriers. youtu.be/eCqGYnxhIF8?t=…

UK Covid Vax is open for booking: nhs.uk/nhs-services/c… Assuming none of my followers are under 16, and you don't qualify because of a job-based risk such as NHS worker, these are the clinical risk groups that qualify.

@QuinnyPig @Waymo Do they still back up if you cross waving a brick menacingly?

These @Waymo self-driving cars are getting scarily similar to humans—they can even inch forward into the crosswalk at a red light like a complete fucking douchebag.

@cybergibbons Do they still call you "piss corridor" even though they've forgotten why?

I do call my team, collectively, fuckers. But that's their job.

The use of cryptographic primitives by developers has resulted in many security issues. I therefore propose that we should call these primitives "fuckers". "We're using the MD5 fucker" "We've decided that the AES-GCM fucker is best for encrypting data"

@cybergibbons I mean come on, I once wrote a microservice for people who were out of fucks... github.com/samjsharpe/fga…

@cybergibbons Nah, we won't. We absolutely fucking love a good sweary library to include.

@ajlanghorn There's this thing the yoot are making called a weblog, commonly shortened to 'blog. I am surprised you haven't heard of it by now.

@cybergibbons Andrew, I came to make a smutty comment, but I just can't... licking the chocolate starfish is very different to chomping on an Ostrich anus.

I've eaten anus a few times. There should probably be some punchline. But there isn't.

@ajlanghorn Are you selling yours for £6000 on eBay?

When I saw Oasis (Reading, 2000) it was £80 for the whole weekend and that included seeing Slipknot, Foo Fighters and Rage Against the Machine as well readingfestival.com/history/readin…

@alfiemoore @RobertJudd4 I heard you'd be very well suited to being a night worker...

@RobertJudd4 I joined not realising work was involved!

I'm on the train where there are teenager lads talking about their career aspirations. One's just said: "I really really want to join the military but not at the moment 'cos there's loads of fu**ing wars on"

@cybergibbons I've never sat opposite you in an airport, no.

Have you ever sat in an airport lounge and watched a dude sat opposite browsing fairly extreme porn, sat across from what looks like his grandma? Me to.

@cybergibbons no

@SamJSharpe Hahhaa fuck off Sam

Morning Defcon humans! Today at 1200, I'm going to be speaking on the ICS Village stage about another year of maritime fuckery. Want to learn about why the MV Dali wasn't hacked? Want to learn how we can seriously impact operations on a vessel, just by changing our IP address?