Johnson Sandbox

Doing that time lapse thing where you and ur buddies sit at a table is so performative IMO

If you say you don’t let your dog eat human food you are a weirdo. Part of dogs being touse are that they clean up the floor when you spill food

If Scottie doesn’t turn it around on the back 9 I’m officially done liking Scottie edits. I’m not even sure he would break par at brown deer from the women’s tees. #FITFO

@walkonredshirts @jacksettleman Yeah the guy who said Jake Knapp in his last tweet is an Idiot 🤣🤣🤣

@jacksettleman Not Jake Knapp

As is tradition, I put $1,000 on each golf major You convince me who to pick, you get 10% of the winnings Who wins the PGA Championship?

@jacksettleman Don’t over think it. Aronimink prioritizes iron play, putting, and par 4 scoring. Scottie is number 1 par 4 scoring at 3.88, an all time iron player, and he’s 8th in putting SG right now. It feels square but Scottie is getting it done this weekend. He is +480, no brainer.

When’s the last time anyone has seen an owl in person. I don’t believe in them

If u a fat dude with a big belly you should not be coming to packed bars. Squeezing past them is impossible and feels homo and weird

Would you rather play performative volleyball in the middle of a college campus for take a right hook from prime Mike Tyson?

U don’t gotta dap up every single person in the room when u enter/leave the room. Just say hello or bye lmao

Old dudes grunt and breathe weird when they piss

They gotta start putting pictures by the names of every Starbucks drink. I was kind of rattled bc I don’t really know my order so I looked at the menu and ordered a brown sugar drink and then they gave me that gay green matcha drink that simp dudes drink. Disgruntled #performativ

Saw a meter maid for the first time up close and personal. Those fuckers are sneaky

Loitering is lowkey just hanging out

My conspiracy theorist buddy told me last night that 12 foot men built the pyramids lol. Any takers?

I just let this freshman work in with me and he then let 3 people work in as well. SPM (sets per minute) is tanking

@WalterFlapjack My gf and her family 🤣

@SandboxMAGA72 Really just depends on who your watching it with

It’s always so awkward watching a movie with people and there’s a sex scene

U ever think abt how “hey Alexa” or “hey siri” are always listening to whatever you are saying bc they are trying to detect you saying “hey ___” I bet hunter Biden Alexa has heard some crazy shit

Everytime someone talks about doing an escape room I get pissed

Dude who invented jumping jacks was a pussy.