djroomba

people my age are PREGNANT and i am scared of WALMART

😭😭😭

can i come over and do this

the sink is CLOSED

me at the aquarium trying to make personal connections with the fish

puts cocaine in my lipgloss so when he kisses me he thinks im god

him:”are u stupid?” me:

LMFAOO

you ever fucked with a song so hard that you restart the song before it's even over???

Having kids is crazy

2020 was not real

imagine you go to get your oil changed and they just SHIT UP AND CHANGE TJE OIL

buckling up my idiot son

I visited a gun shop in Indiana once and had to use the bathroom; inside was a portrait of a naked man with a thick wooden board covering where his private part would be. Curiosity got the best of me and I tried to lift the board. It let off an air horn throughout the whole store