Scarlett Longstreet

Those 45 seconds the car won’t pair with my phone really brings out an ugly side of me

Gone is the $100 day, we are doing $250s.

That man in a vest is not your soul mate.

@Sh_tRalphSays Sadly that is not a need he can fulfill from out of state.

@ScarlettPosner Call your new boyfriend!

Fucked around (divorce), found out (shoveling my driveway).

Carrying the mental load of the holidays all by yourself sweetheart?

What sort of math are these airlines using to calculate rewards miles. 50k mile flight? Babe, I am going to Missouri.

I don’t like keeping a journal cause there shouldn’t be a record of how insane I am.

Praying for all my want the house clean, but don’t want to clean the house girlies.

Girl math is being unwilling to pay $6.99 for shipping but knowing a daily $8 coffee is a human right.

Unwilling to deny myself of anything, except a shopping cart.

Just took a vitamin D to help improve my mood instead of drugs and I don’t think I get enough credit for that.

@sahdschwartz @JeffBezos This is the way. We must eliminate what we can 😒

@ScarlettPosner @JeffBezos The holiday gift guide at my house went into the recycling can before it even got inside. If there’s no gift guide, the kids can’t fight over it. (Of course, they’ll find plenty of other things to fight over.)

Hey @JeffBezos could you plz send one holiday gift guide per child so you don’t start a fucking riot in my house, God knows you have the resources

Mind, body, and spirit feel out of balance when my recent emojis aren’t as they should be.

A haunted house but it’s just my own brain with my own thoughts.

Once they gave me a backup camera it was over. Put me in a vehicle without and people are dying.

Girl math is spending $100 instead of $30 to avoid paying for shipping.

Budget is a slur.

@S_L_Sanderson Haha oh I was 1000% kidding, trying to manifest it for academia

Is (chat gpt, 2023) an acceptable citation? Asking for me.