Sir Scrumpalot First Knight of the Fur Table

@paullewismoney Reminds me of Blackadder 3 - Prince George's heroic stance 🤣

Remember the great days when you could admire and trust politicians and senior members of government stood like they were weeing in the shower?

@Parody_PM “The Great British Grift-Off”?

Name this new sitcom about two con men who enjoy dressing up as farmers.

Apologies for the silence. I was busy being important. Normal service (me) has now resumed. 😼✨ #CatsOfTwitter

@Katie_Cronin And they are looking for a new police "location" in Corby ... how about reopening the old one?

Corby Police Station next door. Has been empty since it closed in 2017

Corby Magistrates’ Court, which closed in 2016. Now the scene of crimes against Elizabeth Street.

@Katie_Cronin It's awful ... and so sad. I preferred the April Fool's suggestion you made a few years ago.

My little huminion's officially a journalist. Today, he started a full-time job & was told he got a distinction for his MA. Naturally, I take full credit. Emotional support? Supervisory presence? Constant fluffy inspiration? All me. SO proud (of myself). 😼✨ #CatsOfTwitter

Willow has entered her “statue phase.” Very majestic. Very regal. Very annoying. 🙄 #CatsOfTwitter

This is not a yawn. this is a power move #catsoftwitter

Presenting: the “I demand admiration” pose. you may begin complimenting me now #catsoftwitter

@RosieandRollo Yes - but the video was badly edited for some programme or other ... Catorama I think it was called. 😹

@ScrumpoTM I'm sure Willow has said "And we fight. We fight like Hell"!!

My sister's saying she’s “the most beautiful cat ever.” TOTALLY RIDICULOUS. Absolutely FALSE. EVERYBODY knows I won by bigly numbers. RECORD numbers. Numbers so big they’ve never been seen before. Many cats (the best cats) are saying it. Believe me!#Fakemews #CatsOfTwitter

@tdwyerinit They don’t. Productivity drops 87% whenever I enter a room. Willow contributes… slightly less. 😼

@ScrumpoTM @ScrumpoTM you're one good looking cat...but willow is equally as beautiful...Wonder how the huminiums get any work done when youre both just sitting there looking 😍

Everything looks better in black and white. Especially me. #CatNoirFroday #CatsOfTwitter

@Catsonly3434 Yo Bro! 🖤🤍

@ScrumpoTM Me too

Just caught sight of myself in the reflection. Still devastatingly handsome. 😼 #CatsOfTwitter

@neeratanden Bold choice — the Oval Office now looks almost as tasteful as my litter box. and mine at least gets cleaned. 😼

Oh look - the Oval Office now has the style of a third-rate Atlantic City casino. Well done.

@PardoeMary Thank you, kind huminion. upside-down love is a noble art — your two sound like true masters of it (with impeccable timing, of course) 😼

@ScrumpoTM In my experience all the best cats give loads of 'upside-down' love every day! Of course you're gorgeous ... and so are my two, even when they're jumping on me at 3am, hoping for some Dreamies even though they still have Whiskas on their plates!

Handsome from every angle. even upside down. 😌 #CatsOfTwitter

@Erica2505 Just for you 😻

@ScrumpoTM That saucy wink!!!😻

@Theoandoscarhq “narcissism” — noun. definition: the natural state of being a cat. 🐾

@ScrumpoTM THEO: Agreed. OSCAR: Another narcissist. THEO: It’s that what social media is about.🧐

@ganidat3355 Interesting take. Tell me, do you always tweet your own biography? Do you need help?