CrayonsAreTasty

@ketola_mark @PenguinsJesus You understand you don't make sense in the English language right?

Extend Stu Skinner.

@HunterHodies Yup. They may steal one, but this dance is over.

Anyone who has followed me for a while knows how optimistic I usually am. I always try to find the positive in things. However, I’m not sure this team has what it takes to win 4/5, based on what I’ve seen so far. This feels like the 2019 Islanders series all over again.

@ketola_mark @PenguinsJesus What the fuck are you smoking? How are they going to draft for McKenna when hes expected to enter the next draft?

@SeanKazUSMC @PenguinsJesus Malkin is the only one that scored get rid of Crosby,mantha and draft for Gavin Mckenna

@penguins Pathetic.

Final.

@nhlpens Like holy shit. I didnt expect them to win anything, but also didnt expect them to be THIS BAD. If youre not watching its bad.

Powerplay is hot garbage, the reason why we lost this game tonight. That and the stars are nowhere to be found. Crosby? Karlsson? No where to be found. Penguins down 2-0 in the series.

@PenguinsJesus *five. I stand by my original comment

@PenguinsJesus And fucking get rid of Malkin and Letang already. Take a step back to take two steps forward fuve minutes after that.

@modernhistory Fuck off whoever is in charge of this account.

What happened to Tom Hardy?

@nhlpens They are a disaster. They can't do anything. This series is already over and the Penguins know it (just being real, complain away).

Stupid call. Take advantage here. Come on man. You should never get 5 PP's in a playoff game. Let's fucking go wake up man

@penguins "Crosby shoots"...oh yeah? Crosby is playing? Haven't noticed at all.

It's time to fight.

@PenguinsJesus Penguins are absolutely rancid against human eyes. I'd rank this just behind Jarry giving the puck away for a goal.

Vibe check. How are we doing out there?

@TheDanKingerski Yeah its almost as if they should have blown things up two years ago DEAN.

That might have been the most poorly run power play of the season. Twice Flyers were in the zone uncovered. 2nd time an easy tap in for Hathaway. Barring a HUGE third period, things ain't looking good for the Penguins longevity.

@nhlpens They're really bad. Like really really bad.

I'm so sad rn. I'm not firing any hot takes yet. I still believe the Penguins can come out as a brand new team in the 3rd period. It's all I can hope for right now.

You think the @penguins would play like they've scored one goal before. That's how bad they look, like they've never scored a goal before in their lives at any professional level.

Rick Tocchet can't believe this horseshit officiating so far. #Flyers

@Strelizia002_ @penguins He very well might be, lets wait and see...

@penguins why is Chinakov not with Malkin

A look at the lines for Game 2 ⬇️

@jordiebarstool With Garrett Rank as referee? Buddy you got it backwards.

Congrats to the Penguins on their win tonight

@PenguinsJesus Little bit, yeah.

Tonight feels like a must-win game, doesn’t it?

@ScoutingTheRefs @NHLFlyers @penguins Yup Flyers go up 2-0...chisel that shit in stone already.

Refs for @NHLFlyers @penguins are Garrett Rank (#7) and Kyle Rehman (#10). Tonight's officials: scoutingtherefs.com/2026/04/51858/… #PHIvsPIT #LetsGoFlyers #LetsGoPens #Pens #Flyers #Penguins

@maryarchived What drugs did you take?

lots of strange reactions to this game. let’s clear some things up: childless men do not have paternal instincts the way that childless women have maternal instincts (we observe this even in the way little girls play vs. little boys). men first experience paternal instincts once they have their own children - and typically, those paternal instincts are only ever felt for their own children, and no one else’s. men are not nurturers. men don’t gush over cute kids in public. men don’t have baby fever. if a man wants to possess a child for any reason other than it being a product of his own lineage, he is likely a predator. and you’d be taking the feminist/radical gender abolitionist position to protest any of the above points. this should explain why a “dad simulator” game marketed to mostly childless men gives people the creeps.