G whiz

I love my coffee shop ran by 5’5” twinks. One told me, “stay warm. If you don’t, I’m going to start beating him” and pointed to the twink with glasses. The laugh that left my body shook the walls.

Pool szn came early

War is Evil.

I have been absent from this app due to taking advantage of market volatility, an accelerating side business, and a corporate merger.

The gayest thing I ever did was buy a Bronco.

It always amazes me to see people heavily condemn public works for communities that desperately need help and funding. Referring to entire communities of humans as “lesser” than - or implying they don’t deserve parks and sidewalks and decent schools.

@consaaang *zooms in*

Close up

I just watched a person cut their burrito on the utensil counter at chipotle. Not only dirtying that public space with their burrito’s entrails, but blocking it from others use during her surgical procedure.

So excited that my new MD is a woman AND married to a woman. 🙌🙌🙌🙌

They have found a more permanent home with others who speak their language, and employment - which is more than I could offer! But I will be so sad to see them go, but happy that they shared with me their chicken soup and a little bit of hope for a brighter future.

@ungodlysamer Slurp

One is not the loneliest number

If you live with expectations, you must accept the pain with the satisfaction. Or you can opt out. And if that seems disastrous to your psyche, consider the expectations the dinosaurs had before they were eliminated.

@clintbuckingham I yelled at his team as well saying “you need to get your teammate in line.” And I don’t care if my temper caused everyone discomfort. You don’t get to touch people’s private parts without their consent. Period. Full stop.

@SecretgAgent I don’t understand how someone could think that was okay.

I play dodgeball every Saturday. As we were slapping hands with the classic “good game” at the end, one b*tch decided to slap our a*ses instead. No one said anything, until he slapped mine, and I did in fact yell at him to never do that again. Especially not to the women.

I am now a father… At least for the next 6 days, as this adorable Russian couple of immigrants has moved into my guest room, and I am teaching them about how to buy a car in America. I’m just terrified that some slick will take advantage of them. So I must protec.

@buffboybrock *raises hand*

so beyond h-word today. i need to be sedated, or bred deep

@TimberTimberG Now - they are free 💕

@SecretgAgent They probably weren’t getting any or as much before…they’re pent up and frustrated.

The way that a fully healed 35+ y/o post-divorce man makes passionate love needs to be studied!

The way that there is this annoying TikTok account using my photos and adjusting them with AI - hopping into livestream chats just to talk to random gay boys, and then the boys HMU on instagram and I have to explain *again* that there is a catfish and TikTok WON’T remove it.

@silverdumbbell Sameeee

I ❤️ being lean

@Ilcanous1 I did it and it doesn’t hurt at all! I have high pain tolerance

@SecretgAgent Do it, it’ll hurt for a long time and you won’t be able to sleep on your sides for a while 🤷🏼‍♂️

I want to pierce my ears.