Not Ron Johnson

Why do women need contraception anyway? So they'll have to stand a little farther away from the stove while pregnant. So what?

Any recs on where I can find a winter coat large enough to accommodate all of the firearms I will now be carrying? Don't say Lands' End.

My next vacation #ThingsLongerThanKimsMarriage

@dwilant Like it matters. My mobile offices come to me.

I'm back from extended Palm Beach vacation. I bet you think I forgot about you, Wisconsin!

I'm going woodcock hunting this weekend.

HAPPY CONSTITUTION DAY EVERYBODY! I read that magnificent doc 4 the 3rd time this a.m. Not the whole thing, just the part on fed pwr. (YUCK)

The only good thing about Wisconsin in the fall is the abundance of corn mazes. That shit's everywhere!

I'm so busy these days I might have to hire some staff, at least to update my Twitter.

In Madison doing shots w/ Sen. Hopper and his mistress. Poor guy.

Something bad about the debt limit increase.

Sorry I haven't tweeted lately. Have been trying to find out who the hell Victoria Norse is. No luck so far.

This debt limit pressure is giving me gray hair. Taking a personal day tomorrow.

Sitting in Senate chamber shooting spitballs at the debt ceiling

There's nothing like sucking a shot of cheap whiskey out of a fat WI chick's belly button

Being in session this week rly chapped my ass. Sen Paul and I are going 2 have 2 take double the body shots this weekend 2 make up for it.

WHO THE $@%* GAVE THE JOURNAL SENTINEL MY CELL PHONE #??????

Held up Senate business today to make up for not doing anything at all over the last 6 months.

At a piano bar in Milwaukee.........I am absolutely shitcanned right now

Watching Lord of the Rings