Sammy retweetledi
A couple of years ago I was about to propose to my girlfriend.
Ring in hand. Speech prepared. Everything ready.
My roommate Joseph burst through the door out of nowhere, tripped over absolutely nothing, and fell face first through a glass table.
Me: (ring still in hand)
Me: (staring at Joseph on the floor)
Me: (staring at the shattered table)
Me: (staring at my girlfriend)
Mood: gone.
Joseph got a large piece of glass in his eye. Was walking around with a cotton pad over it for two months. I put the proposal on hold and helped him through the whole thing because that's what you do.
Then one day Joseph was gone.
My girlfriend was also gone.
Together.
Apparently they bonded during his recovery. Eloped without leaving a single note. I tried to find them. Never could.
So if you've ever wondered why I'm not married right now.
It's because if it hadn't been for cotton eye Joe I'd have been married a long time ago.
Where did you come from.
Where did you go.
Where did you come from cotton eye Joe.
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