Eric Turner

I think bars should display beer prices like a gas station

HEARTBREAKING: the brokest least reliable person you know got a dog

you may know your cats name, but you'll never know what they named you

Pioneering the “Irish Hello” where I turn up unannounced to a friend’s location

I am never deleting this app.

I hate an uneducated hater. Do some research, bitch.

@AriWasserman Pro tip: always hit the goasis. The stop will confuse them.

I once got a ticket in Ashland driving from Columbus to Cleveland. Then two days later I got a ticket in Ashland by the same cop driving from Cleveland to Columbus.

Waking up to see all the evidence that Chappell grew up rich AND that they’ve revealed the security guard was working for her after her fans called me misogynistic and dumb for believing the little girl

Haven’t seen Arsenal this rattled since this time every season

im the first person in my bloodline to read the words 'jorginho beefing chappell roan'

people asking how many libertadores trophies chappell roan has i’m actually crying

You reckon you could light a buzzball on fire and just lob it at people like you’re the green goblin with his pumpkin bombs

tea is tea whether herbal or verbal

@Utdbrizzy Note is next match starting 11 for him to leak

How are you handing Garnacho a note in the 85th minute at 2–8 😂😂

The 2028 Los Angeles Olympics have announced that nine Olympic soccer matches will be played in the L.A. suburb of Columbus, Ohio at Crew Stadium.

growing up a european football (⚽️) fan can i just say that the fact that anybody in any jersey can just sit anywhere during a hockey game is baffling to me. what do you mean you don't need a quarantine zone for visiting supporters so they don't get murdered

Today’s to do list: -Think about past failures -Spend $15-200 -Reflect on recent trauma -Become so over caffeinated I get scared -Abuse a substance

@MrPitbull07 Always fun to watch how stupid people are in the comments, restaurants run on such thin margins, if you were to force them to pay servers and bartenders higher wages, your cocktails are going to be $25 plus, your $20 burger is shooting up to $35, etc.

We went to a dinner as a group and had a $500 bill. We tipped $40. We were happy we can be able to give our server something, but her reaction was the opposite. She told us she assumed we're going to give her at least $120. When we asked for the manager, she said she was just joking, but she wasn't smiling at all. Idk, but is $40 tip enough for $500 bill? I just feel like expecting $120 is not realistic. ~Lea Robertson

fun fact: you can say "that's how they get ya" about almost any circumstance and it's always funny

Baby I could treat you so good you just have to get past my strange and off-putting demeanor and my 1000 yard stare and my inability to behave like a human and the 40 layers of icy fortress walls i have up and answer my riddles