steffi groezinger

If I saw you yesterday and I see you today lets pretend I'm not wearing the same outfit!

Friends

@YaPrestone Everyone who voted rhinoceros please go watch My Octopus Teacher. It’s on Netflix, then we can have a revote.

It’s funny that they take your temperature at Wet Willy’s but not the airport

@MikeHaverstick I was very concerned

I’m obsessed with Facebook marketplace

Girls, if we all go to the bathroom alone the lines will move much quicker A PSA

I've been trying to figure out what Donald Trump smells like. It is obviously something bad but it's probably bad in a way where you'd smell him and be like, I have never met another human being who smells like this, how is this possible. My current best guess is old coins

@erboge I find myself constantly wondering if Harry’s mother knows exactly what she’s capable of creating. Does she know the full extent of what she has done ?

someone hElp

Me at the Manasquan vs Wall thanksgiving day football game this year My brain: Dont do it Dont do it Dont do it Dont do it Dont do it Dont do it Dont do it Dont do it Dont do it “You know this is the last one right ?”

@boujeesIut @jainevincent

me: hi! how are you today :) customer:

@ChipotleTweets Good evening, There’s mold on my chip. That’s all, Stef

Even if you could care less about these two.. this is a MUST read

its the weekend baby. you know what that means. its time to drink precisely one beer and write it on my calendar

People are out there just killin spiders with their bare hands

crying

@erboge may it Rest In Peace

@erboge There goes our friendship

I deleted Snapchat (tbd when I’m getting it back) so Nat has been texting me all the snaps she normally would send to me and THAT my friends, is loyalty

Uber driver is playing arms of an angel, really contributing to my Sunday scarries

Guys pls look at my uncle blending in in Japan

*A love story* One time this guy told me he couldn’t pick me up because he had “subs taking up all his seats” and I was like woah, guy love sandwiches... he could be it for me Anywho he was talking about subwoofers and it didnt really work out