StoolieHeel

@VivaLaStool @DanteTheDon @DanteTheDoc @barstoolspringb @barstoolsports @nickysmokess @KaticMichael @ella_grif @TomScibelli Holy shit!

WILD story by Dante right here:

@danabeers Eat, you'll feel better

Derrick White is making me sad

@OhioTate Get a marine/camping porta potty and a curtain

An important update on the upcoming $30K Solitary Confinement stream. We have an extremely large (4 inch) Porta Potty crisis on our hands

@AJTarHeel247 If he can't speak English, how is he supposed to do school? Gotta have some academic standards, right?

Maxim Logue, a 6-foot-9, 232-pound forward who committed to North Carolina last week as a transfer from Florida Atlantic, is not expected to enroll at UNC after all, a source close to the situation confirmed to TarHeel247 on Thursday afternoon. 247sports.com/college/north-…

@DannyJConrad Chill chill....Just friends, just friends 🧊

Brianna Chickenfry has liked an IG reel of Reed talking about her. It’s officially time to go home and just chill.

@OhioTate Nikki Smokes is insufferable... Get rid of him 🙄

Contestants: Mintzy Annika Rico Tommy Klemmer Doitche Spider Mikey Bets Dana Beers Katic Nate Meek Phil Ella Grif Megan Makin Money Connor Burns Hannah Montoya White Sox Dave Wonton Don Nicky Smokes Reed Blutman Dante (and anyone you convince to join before Monday) WHO WINS?

@BlooperBraves Is Blooper now a chick? Getting female vibes 🤔

ZADDYYYYY OOOOOO SENDS ME HOME HAPPY

This is the most fucked up thing I’ve ever had to admit. I think I have eaten too many fries in my life to the point where I don’t really look forward to fries anymore. As a matter of fact if I saw fries and cole slaw on a menu as a side I would go with cole slaw. It’s like when you eat too much of something and get sick of it. I’m not proud of this development and I know I will get shit for it but that’s baseball.

@BarstoolBigCat Tough week for Olsen...The Greg Gauntlet time is broken and now this

It’s 3rd leg Greg’s music!!!

@MeganMakinMoney Sup

Open the throat and power through

@PFTCommenter And Jerry Bing Bonging with no underwear 😂

Sixers Celtics game seven in Vegas would result in violence. Need it

@BizNasty2point0 @RearAdBsBlog @BoyerCandy RA and Whit during Sabres game for the Barstool Brand

@RearAdBsBlog @BoyerCandy We’re sponsored by Reese’s.

@stoolpresidente Doitche needs to be his stunt double wherever he goes 👍

For immediate release:

@DannyJConrad @Katiemoneygrabz Flat feet always plays 🦶 Or go the Trump route with bone spurs 😎

I’ve ghosted the troops, denied desperate soldiers over the phone, texted pleading lieutenants back saying no thank you, but it’s been 4 weeks and I still can’t shake this “April Fools prank” You win @Katiemoneygrabz there I said it. Now please sort this out with your people

@MrDJPK @BarstoolBigCat @BlooperBraves revealed! Not fat! 😂

Going to miss Bloopy! Jacob was a solid guy and really brought the character to life for fans of all ages. He is HIM !! THE STANDARD IS THE STANDARD.

Hoping @reedt4723 and Pete are finally together in their apartment sharing a burrito and reminiscing over their week apart 🙏🧊

@BohmIsKing @Braves Love this! Phillies and Mets fans are the funniest (and fuckin DUMBEST) people on Twitter 😂😂😂

The Phillies win streak starts tonight. Y’all better not think your division lead is safe @Braves We. Are. Coming.

@CigsMake You can still do all these things... Just do it... Nobody took anything from you... Drama Queen! 🙄

This is what they took from you. Trucks, baseball, apple pie, and hot dogs

@PFTGym @hen_ease Obviously had to have his mom put on his pillowcases...😂

People forget Hank could’ve gone pro in the big leagues (yes this is real)