Mel Medarda

Since certain peers have elected to open the floor to public inquiry, I'll extend the same courtesy and reopen my updated post box once more. melmedarda.straw.page Clarity, tact, and actual thought are encouraged. Anything less will be discarded without ceremony.

Alright.

HEAR YE HEAR YE

My ducks are always in row. Ordered. Disciplined. Behaving predictably. Your ducks, in contrast, are scattered. In disarray. Waddling aimlessly. Desperately waiting for somebody to impose structure.

@best_darkin I’m not weak.

@THEMEDARDA You mortals will eat ANYTHING This is why you will all be weak

I admit I’m curious to try a… “hamburger”, is it?

@R0SETAKEN Deal.

@THEMEDARDA Me and you are getting one, right now

@R0SETAKEN I suppose it was never amongst my priorities.

@THEMEDARDA I can't believe you've never had a hamburger. Especially since you've lived in piltover.

@AlexLazyBae An addiction to hamburgers seems unlikely.

@THEMEDARDA We’re about to witness addiction

@Mizfortunezz What’s the matter?

@THEMEDARDA MEL NO NO

mel medarda ☀️

@theninjaman1358 Yes. A hamburger.

@damn_lizard I am fond of salads.

@THEMEDARDA Burgers are messy, try tacos instead, or like, a salad

@R0SETAKEN Kino… 😒

@THEMEDARDA Wow Mel. Wow.

@AnnoyingDuck3 You almost sound convincing.

@THEMEDARDA You've been hanging out in Piltover too long then, McNoxus is the SHIT, good prices AND good food. I recommend the Sion meal, really good and pays respect to the Hand of Noxus

@AnnoyingDuck3 I have never heard of “McNoxus”.

@THEMEDARDA Go to McNoxus and eat one. They're delicious.

@AnnoyingDuck3 That is helpful.

@THEMEDARDA Burger.... 🤤🤤🤤

@ReckonerRell The arena does have a way of improving a story.

@THEMEDARDA Oh...that's a weird story. Would have thought I would hear something like that in the Arena. The guys there tell really funny stories.

There’s a certain Noxian general whose strategy was to drink the enemy under the table before battle. He never lost a war, though the liver told another story.

@damn_lizard I imagine the general omitted that detail for the sake of his dignity.

@THEMEDARDA I knew that guy well, I betcha he never said a yordle was the only one to ever out drink his ass, one hundred and thirteen drinks in, almost passed out myself

@_deception__ Hello.

Now that I was force to do

@Iron_Revenantt Hello, Revenant.