Matt Mabe

@Wendys is really dropping the ball by not giving us AI Dave Thomas

It took me 42 years to get here but I think I actually might be the happiest I've ever been

Sobriety reeks of white privilege

In a pinch your nail clippers can double as a roach clip #protip

The value of expertise 🤌🏻

Having a dad bod is one of the most satisfying experiences of my life

Accidentally bought some whole-bean coffee and I don't have a coffee grinder, so my weed grinder has been working overtime

This is the day of the expanding man

"Girls don't like boys Girls like cars & money" - The Maddens

RIP to everyone that has ever died. WE MISS YOU MFERS!!! 🙏 ❤️

The afterlife or the afterparty?

I'm constantly amazed at how good it feels to play music onstage. Tonight was a gooooood one 🥰

@elonmusk @realDonaldTrump Lol boycotts aren't fucking illegal. All of this is so fucking stupid

Thank you, President @realDonaldTrump!

@jessi_england8 Holy fuck we're on the same cycle 🤯

What phase of the menstrual cycle is just wanting to watch WW2 and cartel movies? This seems like some luteal phase shit for sure.

Rap/Hip-Hop is the most punk-rock music to happen since punk rock happened

I said it before and I'll say it again....boomers are the WEAKEST generation

Choose your 90s Creep:

My algorithm is psychotic lol

@rustyrockets It's the working all the time and having nothing to show for it. BARELY able to pay rent. That makes us sick.

Why do you think America is such a sick nation? Is it the plants and air, or is it the food and medicine?

@elonmusk Lol this is fucking idiotic

Not exactly great value for money!