Alan Garner

185 posts

Alan Garner

Alan Garner

@TheAlanGarner_

I am NOT Alan Garner - This is a parody account

Katılım Mayıs 2012
0 Takip Edilen15.1K Takipçiler
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Everyone Retweet my last tweet!!! MAKE IT HAPPEN
English
2
5
4
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
1 tequila, 2 tequilas, 3 tequiklas, 4 teuiqlas, 5 teuiqlsd, 6 teiqulkss, 7 eteiqlas, 8 treqiklas, 9 trwqiukas 10 trewquwtss.
2
307
114
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Only true friends go straight to your refrigerator when they go to your house.
English
6
158
41
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
DEAR WALKWAY, Please get wider... SINCERELY, 3rd friend walking behind feeling excluded.
English
2
81
36
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Girl: What color are my eyes? Guy: 34C
English
0
145
64
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Rearrange these words: 1) PNEIS 2) HTIELR 3) NGGERI 4) BUTTSXE... Did you read: Spine, lither, ginger and subtext? Naughty Naughty.
English
3
171
52
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
You gotta hand it to the midgets... Because sometimes they can't reach it.
English
0
187
79
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
A ghost could be humping you right now and you would never know...
English
3
196
52
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Pardon me, Sir Gangster? Your trousers are descending.
English
1
106
54
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
"Dude, I wasn't that drunk" "You threw my hamster and saying "GO PIKACHU!"
English
1
110
53
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Check out these 20 pics. They are very trippy and will trick your eyes. #2 and #5 are amazing!!! bit.ly/P3L5zW - sp
English
0
8
5
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Saving a file as "asfaghasjasd" because you're too lazy to write a proper title.
English
0
58
24
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.
English
1
195
74
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
What does a Tennessee football fan do after they beat Alabama? Turn off the xbox and go to bed.
English
2
147
40
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Dear McDonald's, Thank you for not selling hot dogs. I don't think I could order a McWiener with a straight face.
English
1
171
51
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
That mini heart attack you get when someone says "We need to talk"
English
0
107
29
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
I got arrested for punching this guy at a new years party... When you hear an arab counting down from ten your instincts tend to kick in.
English
0
285
125
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Girls are magic. They can get wet without water, bleed without injury, and make boneless things hard!
English
1
155
69
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
Girls, if a guy pauses a video game to text you back... marry him.
English
1
229
66
0
Alan Garner
Alan Garner@TheAlanGarner_·
I love my pet wussy. Retweet if you read that wrong.
English
2
169
17
0