The Deducers 🌎

What’s everyone doing for the apocalypse?

@cirnosad They’re just pulling from team America at this point

🚨 RED ALERT: The Mossad is planning a nuclear false flag that it intends to pin on Iran. It will be 10x bigger than 9/11, so around 29,000 people will be killed. Amerimutts are extremely stupid people so most will fall for it, unfortunately. It will follow the theme of the movie Peacemaker, which featured a backpack portable nuclear weapon. At the time, the movie was a PSYOP directed against Pakistan and Yugoslavia, but by the time it was filmed Pakistan had achieved nuclear breakout (discretely so had the DPRK through the same program, but Amerimutt intelligence was too dumb to put two and two together). Amerimutts aren't very creative. I've been warning people about this exact scenario for years. The target will likely be NYC, Manhattan.

@RisingApp @GeorgiaTheatre Can’t wait to go

Athens, GA, we’re coming your way! We’re so excited to be playing at the @GeorgiaTheatre on April 14, 2026. Come spend the night with us and be part of something special! Ticket Link: axs.com/events/1364509…

Who is the monster behind my mother? app.reelshort.com/app-video-shar…

I can’t imagine how much Pepsi was drank today

Saying hi and being prepared for follow up conversation are two completely different things.

ever thought about centaurs and how the bottom half would start walking immediately after birth but the top part would be baby like and flop around for a while.

@ddsmidt You’ve got this

I've confidently made so many bad decisions, yet somehow I still doubt myself.

Apparently, Kohls cash, and MyMcDonalds rewards points aren’t calculated into one’s net worth, which means I’m considerably less affluent than I previously thought.

I’m learning to speak Italian so I don’t look like a dumbass ordering at Olive Garden.

Revenge isn’t sweet, it’s probably more like sticky.

If someone shows up at my house unannounced, I won't open the door. I just stand on the other side of the glass shaking my head no.

Her: I want to have sex with you *hours later Me: I think she wanted to have sex with me

I have nothing in common with people who don’t believe that dogs smile.

Don’t tell me a murder was senseless, TV news. Give me the facts and let me decide for myself.

@MoMohler Don’t be ridiculous

I need a sleep apnea machine, but I have no room in my bedroom. Unless of course I get rid of my movie theater butter pump or my Jimmy Buffett Margaritaville blender.

X is kinda like a feral cat community. Whenever some disappear, it quickly fills in with new cats.

@RiyaJosephMallu @TheCinesthetic One of the best lines in the whole series

@TheCinesthetic “You lived your life for the king. You’re gonna die for some chickens?” “Someone is.”

What’s the coldest quote you’ve heard from a movie/tv show?