thedeep.life

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You can’t bully someone into changing their mind. True change happens through connection, not coercion.

The goal of a great discussion isn't to land on the same page. It’s to explore different views. Nods and smiles stroke your ego and close your mind. Thoughtful questions stoke your curiosity and stretch your thinking. Consensus makes you comfortable. Dissent makes you smarter.

Most of the time attacking someone for a belief or attitude is more likely to get them to hunker down and deepen their position rather than change their mind.

If you really want to grow and learn and change and become better, you must be open to being vulnerable, to looking stupid, and to getting rejections. That's just how it works.

✔️ Thank the other person for listening and for being open to constructive criticism. ⁠ ✔️ Be open to being held accountable for your own behavior. ⁠ ✔️ Focus on helping them, not shaming them. ✔️And above all, use accountability as a tool – not a weapon. ⁠💪 (2/2)

When holding someone accountable: ✔️ Prioritize what's really important.⁠ ✔️ Avoid general character attacks; focus on specific behavior. ⁠ ✔️ Speak with clear, kind and respectful language (if you keep your composure, they're more likely to be open to listening). ⁠ (1/2)

Accountability can be a good thing – when it's proportional to the offense and done with humility + a desire to help. ⁠But self-righteously shaming people (or getting hysterical about every.little.thing) is both immature and counter-productive. (And yes, both sides do this🤦).

In other words: if someone examines your behavior for long enough, they're bound to find *something* you're doing wrong (especially if they're looking for it 🔍). ⁠

Is work actually important for people’s personal growth and development? (For example: Does it help people figure out their purpose in life, or learn and grow in ways that being jobless would not?⁠) (8/8)

Reading about the new anti-work movement got us thinking…⁠ ⁠ Should your work/job be a core part of your identity? Or is work just, well, … work?⁠ (7/8) ⁠

Recently, a host of viral @tiktok_us videos 📱have emerged with a similar theme: "I don't have goals. I don't have ambition. I only want to be attractive." (1/8)

In a climate that prioritizes shallow, reactive thinking and inflammatory “clickbait” content (even for the most complex of issues) … it’s even more important to stay open-minded + respectful, and go out of our way to engage in deep, reflective thinking.

When someone doesn't buy your idea, remember this: you might not either if you weren't selling it. Data: 57% of people rejected their own argument when they thought it was someone else's. Critical thinking is holding yourself to the same reasoning standards as you hold others.