Tom Fox

Does anybody else get this same recurring dream? Where @kylieminogue appears in a pair of gold hotpants? Then she disappears and comes back in a short dress and thigh-length boots? Then again in a bikini? Hang on, sorry, I don’t mean dream, I mean internet browser history.

Crowds almost one deep. #abolishthemonarchy

@RubbishWife Oh, we’re wanting hobs now? Spoilt is what you youngsters are.

Status: hob is in and working, dinner is done. Me time now

@ratty_out Congratulations! Good luck at Wemberlee.

The binoculars celebrations and people dressed in fucking hedges have sent me 🤣🤣🤣 COYR! #SaintsFC

@RubbishWife @Annjj Have you not got a chip pan on the new place then?

@Annjj @TomFoxTom So am I after three days starvation

Current status:

@Annjj @RubbishWife I’m waiting for my invite to the big housewarming party. I’ll probably just turn up , stay for a few days, be my usual helpful self.

@RubbishWife Oh buggeration. I take it you’ve moved closer to @TomFoxTom. You’ve shirked your responsibilities for months now, the man’s a mere husk

@FillsWhales Perfect.

@TomFoxTom "Did I tell you mother died? Awful business. We weren't expecting it because we had tickets to Blood Brothers the same day and couldn't get a refund." The Alan Bennett version.

Overheard conversation in local Sainsbury’s. Male employee 60s to female employee 50s with trolley: “Ow are you getting on with your menopause then? Are you wanting to blow up any rollercoasters? My mate’s wife didn’t speak to him for 8 months and he had to sleep downstairs.”

@parker__farquer @Lichtbolletje Hmmmm.

@Lichtbolletje @TomFoxTom Uh...... absolutely. Mmmphm.

But, WHY??? Don't answer that. Polite face.

@Lichtbolletje @parker__farquer Yess! I thought so.

@TomFoxTom @parker__farquer You ofcourse!

@parker__farquer @Lichtbolletje Her or me?

@TomFoxTom @Lichtbolletje Odd from someone so beautiful.

@parker__farquer We know that. We’re still impressed.

@TomFoxTom I can do anything.

I don't like to interfere, but I do hope that not too many of you in the UK have voted for any parties beginning with R.

@TomFoxTom You are insightful like me, Mr Foxtom. Admiring face.

@Lichtbolletje @parker__farquer But the poor thing was destroyed by dark forces. It must be true but she said it. 😁

@TomFoxTom @parker__farquer Too this day I am wondering how on Earth SHE was possible...

@LessGrumpy @parker__farquer Agreed.

@TomFoxTom @parker__farquer Hopefully it wakes the major parties up before the general election.

@parker__farquer Soundbite society innit.

@TomFoxTom I don't think people think things through anymore Mr Foxtom ☹️

@parker__farquer Furiously polite. That’s a tough one to pull off.

@TomFoxTom I am FURIOUS, Mr Foxtom. Polite face.

Thrilled to be supporting No Mow May.