Top Biller Ledge

1) remembered my password 2) missed the ketamine 3) ran an elaborate pyramid scheme selling bright socks to recruiters that was successful for about 12 minutes

OK. Now what?

Literally just woke from a #recruitment coma. Legendary night out that.

"I'm going to start my own agency next year. Then, when it's massive, sell it for £50m". #StupidThingsRecruitersSayAtXmas

"I'm going to open the Singapore office next year. And will definitely stop doing cocaine". #StupidThingsRecruitersSayAtXmas

"Next year will be different. Next year I'm gonna smash it". #StupidThingsRecruitersSayAtXmas

It's two days before Christmas so if anyone in your office even thinks about picking up the phone, give them a slap from me #recruitment

"Either you'll sell to them, or they'll sell to you, which one's it gonna be?" Said every cunt, ever. #recruitment

Top Tip: Don't like knock-backs on sales calls? Do less sales calls. #recruitment

You can literally hear a pin drop in my office. The classic deafening silence of December in the #recruitment industry #PhoneYourOwnMobile

Top Tip: When the CEO is in the office, act like a brown-nose cringey twat. Your team will think you're awesome. #recruitment

Cracking effort by @Tim_Bunn1 at eSynergy on LinkedIn. Complete and utter bollocks like, but a decent effort all the same mate #recruitment

It's Nov 27th and I've just seen the first "New Year New Career".... for fuck's sake, kill yourself now, you #recruitment bellend

.@LinkedIn is like a car crash on the motorway: it's fucking awful but I can't stop staring at it. #recruitment

Let's get the #LinkedIn brain teasers on Twitter: just reply with the first word you see: F B U E C L K L O E F N F D #recruitment

Agencies posting pictures of themselves on LinkedIn celebrating after a 'great week', you cringy, cringy bastards #recruitment

Hi @ArgyllScott can I apply for the "PM - Fake Ad" please? Lots of interest being generated on LinkedIn this morning

When someone asks what you're doing this weekend, be a cunt, and say you're "coming into the office to do some work" #recruitment bellends.

@RichTigheBrady isn't everyone?

I dream of a world where Rec2Recs include a location and salary on their jobs, rather than lots of > **HOT JOB HOLY FUCK** #recruitment