UK Export Records

@DoesntMark what are your views on apps listening to your likes/dislikes and then spamming you with adverts Mark?

@DoesntMark what are your views on the festive period Mark?

@TheIrishKop @DoesntMark He played for Ireland obvs.

I don’t like @TheIrishKop. I do like Ireland obviously

@DoesntMark hello sailor

@TessaChris2 @DoesntMark #wand

@DoesntMark Fuck you asshole

I don’t like @TessaChris2

How did I do? #RealChange #LabourManifesto

@DoesntMark who is going to be the next spurs manager Mark?

@MattSmythAudio @DoesntMark I don’t like questions

I don’t like the male genitalia. All the other players used to wave theirs in my face after a match and tell me mine was pathetic. Which was bad because my ex wife Sandra used to do the same thing. Now I have no mirrors in my bedsit which show below neck height

I’d be delighted to have just hit 200 followers, except I don’t like any of you. I don’t even like Twitter but I’m really lonely since my ex wife Sandra left me. I only get out of the bedsit on a Saturday when I’m on @BBCMOTD. Or to buy my halibut

@DoesntMark Did he make you have wobbly knees Mark?

I was headbutted once by Bruce Grobbelaar. I didn’t like it. He said I’d been shit in defence against Norwich City. Alan Hansen was laughing.

@DoesntMark are you a fan of grime music?

@DoesntMark Order a new Sandra

I don’t like relationships. My ex wife, Sandra, used to tell me I was terrible at them

@DoesntMark There’s nothing to like about Alan Shearer

I don’t like dancing. Sandra never wanted to dance with me. One night at the MOTD end of season party she danced with Alan Shearer and they disappeared for a while in the cupboard. When she came out she was smiling. I don’t like cupboards

@DoesntMark Alan shearer is a w**ker

I don’t like commentary. I prefer to watch the game in silence

@DoesntMark There’s only so many Sandras Mark

@DoesntMark Mark also loves U.K. Export Records

I don’t like Everton, obviously. I also don’t like hate. I just generally don’t find much that pleases me. Except halibut, and LFC. And the Irish national team. And Preston

@DoesntMark You told me that you and Sandra, and I quote, “quite liked a high quality jungle riddim during intercourse.” You said it’s one of the only things you like. You did.

I don’t like exports. We should keep everything in this country

@DoesntMark @THEBLUU9 Me neither dearie... A better description of your good self Mark would be “dreary” imho brb omg

I don’t like @THEBLUU9

@DoesntMark I don’t like Mark. I love him

I don’t like cookies