The Janitor🛡️

@RobDawsonESPN should just hire a hitman

Man United have a potential wage issue with Andre Onana. Given how well Senne Lammens has done, there isn’t much appetite to have him back. But his increased salary could be a stumbling block to securing another move. espn.co.uk/football/story…

@utdHarryy he is simply an average footballer with some flashy moments now and then

I’ve said I know it’s unpopular but I’d keep Zirkzee as a squad option. There is a good player in there we just need the right manager to maximise his potential.

@UnitedStandMUFC oh my fucking god for fuck sake

🚨 Andre Onana's salary is set to increase with Man United's likely European qualification. There are concerns that this will make it more difficult to find suitors, and there is a possibility that United have to contribute to wages on either a permanent or loan exit. [@RobDawsonESPN] #mufc

@SimplyUtd @FrazFletcher who the fuck

🚨 Manchester United told Charlie Cresswell is keen on joining if INEOS make a move, with his summer price now clear. [@FrazFletcher]

@charlieINTEL oh my god bruh

'Dave Chappelle' Operator bundle is coming to Call of Duty: Black Ops 7 and Warzone during Season 3

@0161Chino (with him handpicking every player)

@0161Chino he’s the man to bring them back to the premier league, just needs time and a new squad

Serious club

My lolipop looks like a balloon

@mufcMPB @NathSalt1 oh my god just fuck off mate

🚨 JUST IN: Joshua Zirkzee is determined to STAY at Manchester United and make an impact next season! He firmly believes he will get chances under Michael Carrick once United return to European football. #MUFC [@NathSalt1]

@FabrizioRomano lol

🚨💣 BREAKING: Tottenham agree deal to appoint Roberto De Zerbi as new head coach, here we go! Story revealed yesterday now confirmed as De Zerbi has accepted #THFC job with IMMEDIATE effect. Five year deal set to be signed as De Zerbi decides to accept this challenge.

@mufcMPB @NathSalt1 fuck off

🚨 Myles Lewis-Skelly is under consideration at Manchester United having been offered up to United by intermediaries. #MUFC [@NathSalt1]

@sulkfenomeno @TaalhaUTD gervinho, doumbia and ibarbo

@TaalhaUTD Loic Remy and Daniel Strruidge front two farkkkk

Guys are having to go CEX to buy old FIFA’s as recent as 16 and 17 to experience “nostalgia” 😭😭😭😭😭 just admit you weren’t there and sit this one out g

@htomufc all of this doesn’t matter when half our players are retarded

I think there are bits about Nagelsmann that are grey areas in terms of him potentially being the United manager but honestly, I’ve had my head down doing a lot of research and a lot of ideas, for me*, fit beautifully;.. vertical, (can be) direct, very flexible (sometimes maybe he has too many ideas) high octane, faster tempo, overloads of bodies central to encourage combinations & unique openings, emphasis on creative wingers. I’ve been watching a lot of interviews with him, his English is so good. He seems like a great communicator, often talks about how many 1-to-1s he has every day with his players. I know he can be a bit messy & scattered given he’s still so young but I really really like him.

@vibes_burner watkins 😂

Ndiaye 50m Watkins 30m Anderson 100m Hall 60m Baleba 80m 320m Realistic and doable with sales

@BDR1ZZZYYY you are a drug dealer

Paying 5.80 for gas man this is ridiculous I’m calling the cops

@BDR1ZZZYYY what car did you have again

@UtdJanitor I don’t drive a mustang. 😠

@0161Chino these people just spawn out of nowhere

You’re the real king

@JacobsBen hahahahahaha

🚨 BREAKING: Roberto De Zerbi is now close to an agreement with Spurs following a breakthrough in talks. Five-year contract on offer. De Zerbi had told Spurs last week he wanted to wait until summer, but a lucrative long-term deal has made him open to taking the job now. 🤝 @alex_crook

@htomufc that’s them going down then

Never seen anything like it. What on earth are they doing?