Lil Fish@_not_a_fish
Sometimes God is quiet, sometimes he is loud.
This morning I lost a trade, felt really bitter about it.
It was disappointing, but okay, whatever, that’s the game
I entered another trade shortly after (following all rules) and it started heading to stop loss.
It’s been a challenging few days beyond trading.
When I saw the trade heading to stop loss I felt really upset, I was in bed and threw my phone to the floor.
I was bitter, thinking rudely of God. Thoughts against him, how he doesn’t care about me.
which isn’t true
I got up with a plan to do stuff then later looked at my phone (mind you, when I threw the phone I was ticks from stop loss).
My 2nd trade hit take profit. I’m green on the day.
I honestly felt horrible. Here I am saying God doesn’t care, of course he doesn’t, blah blah blah, and he’s blessing me.
I repented seeing my phone.
I share this story for a few reasons
1. Don’t be like me. Today I slipped in my emotions and let myself think poorly about God, I let myself lie to myself. We shouldn’t think poorly when there is so much to be grateful for. I had a phone to throw. That alone is enough.
This second one can be a real personal challenge to me sometimes.
God is on the same team as us. I tend to feel in the midst of challenge like God is trying to break me or he is against me, he’s my opponent and I must prove him wrong by rising above.
That too is wrong.
2. God is merciful, he had blatantly clear mercy on me today when he had no reason to. He loves us, and he is on our team. The ONLY reason we have value is because he loves us. He wants us to lean on him, to ask for help, to love and praise him. We are not enemies, he is our father and knows what’s best for us.
To zoom out on this whole picture, If God didn’t let me experience the guilt and emotion this morning, I might not write this post.
This post will get many views and many people will think of God. That’s not something I would’ve ever considered had I just won both trades. It’s definitely not something I considered when I threw my phone.
Be better than me, understand God is merciful, loving, and on your side.
Happy Wednesday
