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Being a sentimental memory hoarder has finally come around to bite me in the ass… iCloud wants me to pay $9.99 a month for storage 😭😭😭

Because someone I know has to know them so I gotta spread the word 🤷🏻‍♀️

Bashing pedophiles near my hometown on Facebook because it gives me a thrill

Idc what you got goin on, there is no good reason to bring a dog into a grocery store or restaurant

twitter is cigarette for the eyes

The problem with the world rn is that everyone thinks they need a podcast

any minor irritation & i start having inner monologues like in death note

jujutsuing on his kaisen

You can excite a woman by showing her a wraparound porch or an extremely deep bathtub

would you like to add protein to your $21 salad for just $9 more

The irony of me getting more and more irritated in this pharmacy line while I’m waiting to pick up my Lexapro

When i get more active on twitter thats how you know im getting insane again

I think I’m the only person on social media that does not give a shit about “Bieberchella”

explain it to me like i’m 30

Cause what do you even mean

I’ll never understand loaded teas

April fools doesn’t hit the same living in a misinformation epidemic

i like to hold my cat’s arm cause it feels like a little crab leg

Looking at old photos of myself like I’m my dead wife

Dodging responsibilities at this big age is crazzzzyyyy