allie

new intro i’m Allie -she/her -20yo -chronic illness -i like walking dni fatphobic and anti recovery

@0__mon0 i get you ja mam tak samo. bycie tam jest rough, ale na szczescie dla mnie jest troszke lepiej niz kiedys

@_tired_af__ boże oby bo zawsze mnie triggeruje w chuj bycie w domu rodzinnym

ale wsm boje sie bi będzie to straszne mentalnie przez ed i pewnie chujowe dla mojej wagi ☠️

i feel so guilty

i’m trying to not have a stress induced binge cause i messed up, threw a water bottle up to catch it just cause instead it hit the windowsill, knocked over everything on it including a GLASS with coffee in it and the glass fell on the floor the glass breaking dented my floor:((

just a little bit longer & i’ll get where i need to be, just a little longer ill lose a little more weight i’ll feel abit better abt my body just a little more just a little more just a little more just a little longer just a little more just a few more kg just a little more jsut

@Lexapro_2Omg @lexapro_mg SHIT DID THEY NUKE YOU????

HELP ME FIND MY OLD MOOTS AND OOMFS 💔 @lexapro_mg PLS REPOST 🙏

@luxiyee it really is an all consuming addiction. 10k turns to 15k, that turns to 20, then 25, then 30. you keep trying to push. sometimes you manage to hit 35k! 40k? 45! and then nothing feels valid again. anything less than your record feels pathetic even if it’s objectively a lot🫠🫠

How tf do people manage to get more than 20k steps a day wtf

@milkchan_shed @luxiyee SAME😭😭 it’s a nightmare, i hope you’re doing better now☹️🫂🫂

@luxiyee @_tired_af__ at one point I couldn't sleep bc my hips and knees hurt so bad it kept waking me up and i couldn't stop binging. it's definitely a net negative on everything. not worth it.

@luxiyee yeah it’s really bad:(( like i felt like shit constantly, fatigue and hunger were on another level, i was also wayyy more irritable falling asleep was a nightmare cause of hip, knee & ankle pain and i DREADED waking up cause i would have to get up and get the damn steps in again

@_tired_af__ I didn’t know excessive walking could have so many downsides wtf

the ocd ed comorbidity is LETHAL and i fear I am COOKED

@trainwreckxic most of those seem relevant but i’m not an expert. though i would encourage you to test your creatine kinase (CK). it’s an enzyme that shows muscle breakdown levels. it appears with high exercise levels but also damage to the heart and stuff

a weird number of edtwt is in med or nursing school so does anyone know if these markers r relevant to damage from EDs

@luxiyee also my heart was sm worse during that period. i mean like palpitations, pulse being v low and stuff

@luxiyee i used to and tbh it’s insanity like sharkie said like i was in constant pain, sore, my knees were giving out. also self isolation n cutting ppl off cuz u need to walk😭😭 now i barely avg 10k after a long period of getting like maybe 5k a day but my body feels sm better

@desespo1r yk what jedzenie to jedzenie wiec nie najważniejsze jest co jesz tylko że jesz i’m proud

@tauntifer they want you! they want you as a new recruit!! (that song gets stuck in my head randomly sorry)

girl why does the navy keep trying to recruit me who’s gonna tell them

cw depressing but i’ve been so tired today. like gutturally. i just finished writing a note on my phone that is meant to be read in case/when my body gives out. with what i hope my loved ones do after i die i prob will wake up in the morning but at least it’s here for the future

i told my ex “you are my owen hunt” and the man does not get what it means cause he hasn’t watched the show😭😭

@kochamsue123 kurde trzymaj sie kochana:(🫂🫂

@yearningforevr CHILLING AND VIBESSS

do we have more chilling and vibing today or is it pain and suffering day? let me know.

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