Albright

At this stage, just ignore women, have a quick wank, and save your money for marriage or a new car, whichever you feel like. If a woman wants sex, she can hand you a legal waver signed and witnessed by two court officials, and a priest. That way theres only a 50/50 chance of getting convicted of rape.

The music your parents played growing up stays with you for the rest of your life.

I’ve officially reached the age where i barely save numbers because I’m very sure we won’t talk for long.

Tinubu spoke at Eagle Square and the fact-checkers went to work immediately. State allocations tripled? Mostly true. But tripled naira allocations during hyperinflation is not prosperity. It is inflation wearing a bigger number. Subsidy removal stabilised the economy? Debatable. Tell that to the man spending ₦300,000 on fuel weekly and the family eating once a day. Nigeria ranks second in renewable energy behind India? Completely false. Not even close. China, USA, and Brazil would like a word. APC remains intact? True. But a party that stays together to share power while Nigerians suffer is not a success story. It is a coalition of interests protecting itself. Laser-focused on results? The lights are still off. The soldiers are still dying. The fuel is still ₦1,450. A convention is not governance. A speech is not delivery. Eagle Square looked full. Nigeria still feels empty. 👀 Nigeria observers

Hard to leave Hard to live in

“I did my birthday right beside Wizkid’s house in 2018. There’s nobody from Wizkid’s house that didn’t come to my birthday except Wizkid but i couldn’t take pictures because police arrested me” - Okiki

I don’t endorse any investment scheme Chioma Adebayo or any one

btw, you can still be friends with someone you were once in love with.

お父さんに買ってあげたら2週間で煙草を辞めた灰皿が海外で話題に

tell a sad story in 3 words

Sleep fixes everything until you wake up.

Twitter is less fun because you can no longer tell who is naturally dumb and who is trying to make rent from ragebait

If Arsenal reach a cup final, Raya will be out injured, and Kepa’s throwing one into his own net, to lose Arsenal the game. Bookmark this.

The worst nightmare caught on camera 😳

The Job is an Argentine short film from 2008, and also one of the best of this century.

deep down what you want rn?

i wish people had a 30-second trailer so i could see what I’m getting myself into.

Enjoyed tha!