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What the fuck is happening is this real life what why #Europe

I'm speechless. The guy from Homeland is talking about how interested the Queen is in the Mounties. And now Andrea Bocelli is singing

Kylie Minogue was singing in a wedding dress, while a Frenchman with an unbuttoned shirt was herding 9 normal horses and one tiny white one

Except with even more hilarious groveling of formerly subjugated nations, and, for some reason, lots of horse riding.

Guys- the Queen's 90th birthday celebration is on TV and it is everything that I hoped Eurovision would be

Every country recently invaded by Russia gives 12 points to Ukraine #Eurovision

Man. This thing gets more and more professional every year. Not nearly enough charming silly #Europe stuff. Either that or I am too sober.

I'm pretty sure this song sounds much more hardcore in Austrian German. It is a cover of Du Hast isn't it? #Eurovision

"Oh, I didn't see you there, I was just twirling my skirts in my vineyard" #Eurovision

Apparently Georgia just got a Hives record, and taught Liam Gallagher to play bass

Finally some historical angst-o-vision! #Eurovision

Momentary Jamiroquai video shoutout from Russia #Eurovision

Croatia is going through a big Bjork phase at the moment

This is one of my favorite genres of Eurovision songs: rejected James Bond themes

The rock! It's too much! Deploy the rock-dampening cages! We can only hope to contain t

This is a sparkly Kaaba. Well, it IS

Australia mastered this competition in two years. They have shiny-box-technology that we can only dream of in Europe.

MODULATION CLAXON 🚨🚨🚨🚨

THIS. IS. EUROPE. Finally. I call modulation in this one for sure.

I have such high expectations for this deposed Hapsburg