Alex

Guys I can't tell you how honoured my mum and I are to feature in the new Anne Marie song, even if the lyrics are "got with Alexandra and her Mum." We deny those allegations but we're just thankful for a mention.

Ok until this very moment I 100% thought this show was about Usher the singer. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

@ask_aubry Just reading this post made my eye twitch

This dude: how am I the bad guy when I babysit my own kid sometimes when asked?

The person who said "no point crying over spilt milk" clearly never had a toddler open a new 4 pint bottle of milk and pour it all all over the kitchen floor. THATS A LOT OF MILK MATE

@SheRatesDogs Is that... Ron Swanson? ....?

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@LuxairAirlines what's your policy on under 2s (lap sitting on plane) and taking small travel sized pushchairs on short haul flights? We're traveling from London City to Luxembourg and I can't find any info! Thanks

The toddler is in a god awful mood today. He has major issue with something but he can only point and yell NO so it's hard to identify what the beef is. Still, I'm taking him to nursery soon so it's their problem 🤣🤣

@JennyJohnsonHi5 This is an outstanding summary of an amazing movie! @EuridiceSanchez I feel you'd enjoy this too

MOVIE WATCHING DAY: The votes are in! We’re gonna keep with the natural disaster theme from yesterday’s “hurriquake” and watch Twister! I’ve never seen this movie which makes the experience much more fun! Follow along on the thread below! LFG!!!🧵⬇️

So.. Mr Tumble creepy right?

Why does Bibby Stockholm sound like someone from Made in Chelsea? #BibbyStockholm

@StateOfLinkedIn How does one manage to parent, but then apparently finish parenting before 6am? Would love his tips on managing that one.

Be more Matt

Battling the toddler against a car nap is one of the funniest things about parenting. Driving along going "HENRY WAKE UP HENRY DON'T SLEEP HENRY STAY AWAKE" while blazing out drum and base on the radio. What even is my life 🤣 #dangernap

So are we all just ignoring that twitter seems to be called X now then? Or did I literally miss it? #XTwitter

@ask_aubry Aww I'm so gutted I'm off the market, Kuba looks like suuuuuch a catch

Dude: Dating is so easy for women. Just pick one of hundreds of Nice Guys™ on the app. And what's on the app: Kuba

@PicturesFoIder I do 30+50, then minus 5

How do you do it?

@StateOfLinkedIn Omg this is WILD!! 🤣🤣

Not LinkedIn but this is some unreal scenes 😭

The toddler has had a fever and screamies (not sure how else to describe it 🤣) since Wednesday and only now calming down a bit and honestly I feel like I've CHANGED. There's pre fever me and post fever me. Flippin knackered.