Andrea Bradley

As I sit mere blocks from President Biden at this moment.. let Kamala COOK

Me: Achoo! Henry: Achoo! Me: Henry we sneezed at the same time, how crazy! ……. Me: Henry, I said we sneezed at the same time isn’t that crazy?! Henry: I know. 😐

My children consistently ask to watch The Grinch even 6 months after they’ve seen it last, so I finally shelled out the $7.99. I’ll surprise them on a road trip. Sorry to all other moms but I’ve locked up Mom of the Year 💃🏼

Life comes at you fast. One day you’re 4 years old chasing a butterfly, and a nanosecond later you see a bird swoop down and eat the butterfly

4 year old: “Mom, there aren’t any creatures in the Dead Sea.” Me: “How do you know that, bud?” 4 year old: “because there’s too much salt in it” 😳

@seltzermom Take the drive up to Lockport for their plant sale starting this weekend - they have lots of heirloom varieties and tomatillos! mccollumorchards.com/garden-plant-s…

Couldn’t fully enjoy the total solar eclipse because my daughter was busy whining but look how cuuuuute

“Maybe she’ll be easy to potty train” she said to herself as her daughter pooped in the bathtub for the 50th time in 15 months

WHY DO WE ALWAYS LOSE TO THE JAGS?! I scream into the void that is the sleepy New Orleans Warehouse District

@paddybrads *prophetic

Someone prothetic said last night..if Ed Oliver eats then the Bills dominate. Damn that was a good take.

@RealTonyBones @paddybrads You should see my notifications

@paddybrads @andiibradley we need to talk…

My wife has 120 browsers open on her phone. 120. That’s psycho behavior.

Paddy Braids

Starting to fully understand my next door neighbor growing up. Having a coffee mug in her hand was her ENTIRE personality. I can still hear the way she pronounced caw-fee. I am her and she is me.

How is it that in 2023 I cannot stream the US Open women’s final many hours after the fact? Some of us can’t turn the tv on during daylight hours unless it’s for audiences under 5

New parenting goals: unlocked

Buried the lede with the Poyer/Hyde-flats/drums analogy

I guess it helps that this DJ is spinning the finest hits of 2006-2013

Having a grad party next door is like being at a wedding but you can wear your pjs. Patio door is open, meal prepping, drinking wine, and dropping it to ‘Shots’ without having to socialize 💁🏼‍♀️

Later that night……

I will crowd-fund independent projects and reboots wait what’s this new Tiffany haddish thing I just saw

Streaming services and CEOs are underestimating the public’s willingness to watch a single show for the rest of their lives. I’ll watch Seinfeld and GBBO, switch back to cable for reruns, pay for Cameos, and consume spon con