Andrew Kelly

@virginmedia have tried to contact you via email and phone to remove a hazardous street box from outside of our house. Is it possible to arrange this please?

@PeteCarr94 @qikipedia I wouldn’t call it compulsive, just compunsive

@qikipedia @andykelly23 get yourself checked out 😂

A compulsive need to make puns can be a sign of brain damage.

Congratulations to @Carras16 - our new #MUFC captain!

Maybe Mexico could build a wall around Trump? #election2016

@djrhyslewis Phil Collins, Son of Man would go down a treat

Thank you everyone for your messages , words can't describe how gutted I am , my road to recovery starts now, I will come back stronger.

@tomprocterr @PeteCarr94 is this not crystal clear to you two?

@tomprocterr @TeamToDieFor 😂 Shame the signings weren't Ramos, Kroos and Illaramendi haha

@PeteCarr94 didn't you have to resit a few years though mate?

If Blatter had even a crumb of dignity remaining, he'd walk away now, creep back to his lair, sit in his armchair and stroke his cat.

Would just like to thank fruit n' fibre for the hair in my cereal, it was delicious.

“@PoliticalReactz: When one team lets you down on your accumulator pic.x.com/Qh8z0YPql5” @MJBressington

Got so bored revising today I searched 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney on Google maps. Sadly it doesn't exist

This is one #SuperBowI of cereal...

It's a sad state of affairs that the person who has texted me most over the last couple of weeks is our letting agents.

Who knew it could rain so much in dry January?

New year... same old me

@PeteCarr94 first answer he's given which makes sense and doesn't use the word "philoschhophy"

@TheLadBible @MJBressington seen this done before

'Tis the night before Christmas