Werewolf Bar Mitzvah

Survey Says: Which teammate could be mayor? Pittsburgh electing Kyle Dubas' doppelgänger Corey O'Connor as mayor gave me the idea for a Survey Says: Which Penguins player could be mayor? Here's how the players (and some now-former Penguins) answered. Bryan Rust: “I’m not going to say (Kevin) Hayes because he’s probably a popular answer. I’m going to say Erik Karlsson. Very smiley, very upbeat, very bubbly. Shoots it straight when he needs to, and he can sugarcoat it when he needs to.” Noel Acciari: “Probably Hayesy.” Ryan Graves: “Mayor of Pittsburgh? I think Sid. But just a general mayor, it’d be Hayes.” Jack St. Ivany: “I’d say Tanger. He’s got the brain for it, he knows a lot about everything. Rutger could be the face of a campaign, but I don’t know if he’d be coming up with the ideas himself.” Rutger McGroarty: “Tanger, he’d be a good mayor. (Me: Ivy said you could be the face of a campaign but not the idea guy.) He’s not wrong!” Brett Kulak: “Sid, he’s got leadership skills and commands the respect of his peers.” Tristan Jarry: “Tanger, because he’s good at arguing.” Stuart Skinner: “Sid, he’d be the best.” Ville Koivunen: “Hayesy!” Sidney Crosby: “I think Cliffy. He could definitely do it. I’ve got to go with Rusty, too. Rusty could run for mayor.” Ben Kindel: “Rusty. He’s like, the mayor of the sewerball circle.” Connor Clifton: “Sid, the captain. He’s the best, you know?” Connor Dewar: “Sidney Crosby.” Rickard Rakell: “Everyone’s going to say Sid, so I’m going to say Hayesy. He’s a great guy.” Kris Letang: “MAYOR BOKO!” Sergei Murashov: “I think Bryan Rust, he’s responsible. He’s smart, he could handle it.” Harrison Brunicke: “Probably Hayesy, to be honest.” Justin Brazeau: “Sid, everybody would vote Sid.” Sam Poulin: “Tanger. I feel like he’s involved in a lot of things in the city, and he’s been around a long time. He’s got experience.” Tommy Novak: “Crosby, he’d probably win.” Erik Karlsson: “I’m going to say Blake Lizotte. He seems like he’s a trustworthy guy, and he’s got a good vocabulary.” Parker Wotherspoon: “Shea, he could run. He’d get a few votes. He’s pretty calm. I don’t know his politics, but he’d win some people over.” Blake Lizotte: “I think Tanger could. He’s pretty political, knows his stuff, opinionated. He’d do a good job.” Anthony Mantha: “This guy right there (points at Letang). He’s grumpy enough to do it.” Ryan Shea: “I feel like Sid is the easiest answer, he’d be the best at it. Maybe Tanger, he would just enforce his rules. He’d be strict. Tanger would be a funny one.” Arturs Silovs: “Let’s say Cliffy. (yells to Clifton) CLIFFY! You’re the mayor of a city now.” Joona Koppanen: I would say (St. Ivany). He went to a good school, he’s a smart guy. He went to Yale.” Matt Dumba: “Hayesy has to be the pick. He’s going to chop it up with everyone.” Kevin Hayes: “Me. I take care of the boys.” -- From Taylor Haase in Tampa

i think the heated rivalry fans who spend all their time obsessively hating on the actors need to get into real hockey. spend that energy obsessively hating like, the philadelphia flyers or something.