Mangomochi

‘But however meaningless and vain, however dead life appears, the man of faith, of energy, of warmth, and who knows something, doesn’t let himself be fobbed off like that. He steps in and does something, and hangs on to that.’ 🫶

‘Now I see that I will never find the light Unless, like the candle, I am my own fuel, Consuming myself.’ - The Silent Flute, Bruce Lee.

Perfect Monday - Two minutes before the lecture was supposed to begin I received a notification saying the guest speaker has cancelled. In 7 minutes I cooked up a session plan, rehashed lecture slides and ran the show for two hours. I am mighty impressed with myself. And dead 😵

Stupid sleep 🤬😡😖

There are mornings that arrive without the will to face yourself. Those are the days for walking into green, into places that ask nothing of you, that simply hold you as you are.

The panicking dramatic one is me.

There are days when life just feels like going around in circles around a vortex.

The one meeting for which I walked to campus today apparently is online. And my watch is out of battery so the steps don’t count. 😫😫

என் இதயத்தை... என் இதயத்தை வழியில் எங்கேயோ மறந்து தொலைத்துவிட்டேன் உன் விழியினில்... உன் விழியினில் அதனை இப்போது கண்டுபிடித்துவிட்டேன் இதுவரை எனக்கில்லை முகவரிகள் அதை நான் கண்டேன் உன் புன்னகையில்… 🎶

Someone I know sent me a pdf of their conversation with GPT on a life decision and said ‘read this and call me’. I hope the psyche people are keeping track of what AI interactions are doing to humans and human connections… if such a thing still exists.

Always, the storm.

@chilluvandu I love Derry Girls!

Watch Derry Girls if you havent !

Came across a framework on alternate scenarios & it made me realise this is just my brain on a normal day 🫣I dread the day when those lines between memory, reality & possibility are going to blur. The illusive potential present scenario did make me chuckle 🤭academic word salad!

Serendipity isn't some magic force that just descends on you while you're waiting around, it's what happens naturally when you build momentum. Luck is rarely a winning ticket. It’s more like a sudden crash into a truth, a purpose, or a new reality, which can only happen when you finally break out of your static environment. When a person remains still, their world shrinks to the dimensions of their immediate fears and comforts. A person who hoards everything inside their house hasn't really gained the world, they've just trapped themselves in it. Dostoevsky speaks in detail about this poison of stagnation perfectly in Crime and Punishment. Raskolnikov's descent into madness is directly tied to isolating himself in that cramped, coffin like room. He only begins his journey to heal when he finally steps out into the chaotic streets of St. Petersburg. You cannot think your way into a new life. You must physically move into it, allowing the friction of the world to shape you. As he says in The Brothers Karamazov, "You must love your life more than the meaning of it. Love it regardless of logic, and only then you will understand its meaning." Tolstoy says the exact same thing in War and Peace about how being too comfortable can paralyze the human spirit, trapping us in a kind of dead, artificial stillness. In fact, in the preface to The Resurrection, translator Rosemary Edmomds, refers to a quote of Tolstoy for which I cannot find the source that says, "Life that is still grows sinister." In War and Peace, Pierre Bezukhov spends years emotionally and spiritually stagnant despite his vast fortune, just sitting in comfortable rooms trying to figure out a grand philosophical purpose. He only wakes up to the raw beauty of being alive when he is stripped of his comforts and thrown into the brutal, constant physical motion of marching through the freezing Russian winter as a prisoner of war. By being forced to move, Pierre is forced to truly live. Ultimately, moving is the only way to expose yourself to the messy, unpredictable reality of human experience. Marcel Proust often speaks about motion and how we are often terrified of the unknown, marching into unfamiliar territory is the only way we can finally shed our tight, old shells. We can't calculate what we will bump into when we start moving, but the sheer act of walking forward guarantees we will bump into something. Proust In Search of Lost Time says "We do not receive wisdom, we must discover it for ourselves, after a journey through the wilderness which no one else can make for us, which no one can spare us." A moving person finds their luck simply because they refuse to wait for the world to come to them. By continually stepping into the wilderness, you multiply your chances of stumbling upon the exact person, disaster, or revelation you need to wake you up.

Before Sunrise is unwatchable because it's so good. It's such a beautiful encapsulation of young iPhoneless love, shot on analog film, a nineties time machine of a mysterious Europe that no longer exists, you feel like you are dying as you watch it.

It’s how this seconds conversation is relevant today. I terribly miss SPB’s voice, so so much and I’ll always regret not having his complete version of Karpoora Bommai 😭😭😭😭😭😭❤️

If it is meant for you, it will cross oceans, distances, and doubts to reach you.

wasn’t friendship a miracle on its own? finding someone who softens the loneliness of the entire world just by existing

You need to understand something deeply to finally free yourself from it. And when you do, it is liberating.