ash🫧

@lostblackboy not stupid, just silly is actually something i say to myself a lot bc of my therapist 😂

"are you ok" i am literally a forest fire and i am the fire and i am the forest and i am the witness watching it but thanks for asking

Millions

@addemslit OH! I didn’t even think about that 😅 but i saw someone else suggest keeping it on the ledger so that you still use the credit to cover your rent!

@atchleen They review all of my financial info every year

I can’t believe what I just received

@megannn_lynne the way i would’ve turned to my dad and said “so what im hearing is you owe me ice cream” 🤣🤣🤣

My grandma has Alzheimer’s so it’s often hard to know exactly “when” she’s at in her brain, but tonight she informed my dad how good it was of him to take me for ice cream because it’s important I have a strong male role model, as opposed to those JERKS at my school!

touching grass isn't enough anymore i need to decompose in the forest & become one with the earth

Everyone shut the fuck up and look at my pretty engagement ring :)

pls note i work w preteens & teenagers on an almost daily basis, i love them, but they can be assholes, & that is my way of saying it without actually calling them one (as i don’t want to lose my job). 🤣 **i do issue warnings before i start throwing my crocs toward them!

I absolutely do not believe in physically abusing children what so ever. but i absolutely DO believe in throwing crocs in the general direction of teenagers when they’re being assholes. bonus points if you tell them you have stinky shoes to help the threat of them being thrown

probably my favorite reaction to telling someone im engaged was E’s mom 🤣 I took him to her work this morning & was like “Has your baby daddy told you we’re engaged?” WHAT ARE YOU SERIOUS AHHHHHH IM SO HAPPY!!!! IS THERE GONNA BE A WEDDING? GIVE US A BABY E NEEDS A SIBLING!

i remember walking into the living room when my mom was watching it and she was sitting there mouth ajar, hands over her head telling me no she was NOT okay

my parents were surprised only by /when/ he asked, bc they called it coming a while ago 🤣 they were excited for us but also that they were “officially” going to be grandparents to E my dads exact reaction “I get to be a granddad and not just part time!!”

my grandmothers’ reactions to me telling them Jacob asked me to marry him: Nana: Well Alright!!! Ma: Oh I’m so tickled! very on brand for both of them 🤣🤍 tbh I think they’re both just happy to be adding to their grandkid / great-grandkid counts 🤣🤍

im a fiancée :)

…oh…. Oh no

*deep breath* WHY DO WE HAVE 5 MIDDLE MEN IN THE PROCESS OF PURCHASING THINGS IN THIS FUCKING PLACE I JUST WANT TO SEND THE LINKS AND IT BE DONE NOT HAVE TO CHECK W PEOPLE A B C & D BEFORE THEY ASK ME TO SEND IT AGAIN TO GO THRU W PURCHASING

@Hazelkeech0918 HELL YEAHHHH

@sweetiddies AYE FUCKIN OOOOOOOOOOOOO

we did it joe

@screamfvce FUCK YEAHHHHH!!! you’re HIGHKEY doing a great job! cant wait for you to see that number grow!🤍

someone be proud of me bc lowkey i am doing a great job