🍒farmer’s market mommy🌶

If 3-4 hour movies are going to start being normalized, I’m begging theaters to bring back intermissions

@1000TimesJeff Welcome home! Glad you’re here in time for the sunny weather! 🌯

the food and drink you consume in a movie theater doesn’t really go into your body. it goes into your movie theater body which is separate and holy and harm-proof

In my 50s housewife era: matching cherry red mani pedi, cooking sausage in my cast iron skillet, and wearing a gingham smock apron

Happy Friday the 13th specifically to me, my husband, and the 15 other weirdos that just came out of a screening of Skinamarink

@CandiceRenee @1000TimesJeff I’m honestly not far behind y’all lol

I'm in a bad place mentally and my solution was to impulse book a trip to New Orleans for me and @1000TimesJeff

@apreslegris Unblended. A chunk of banana approximately 5 inches long…..just whole, chilling in the cup

@babeofwrath Unblended???????

Fucked up to take that pic of a woman buying a banana at Whole Foods. God forbid someone wants a snack. However, this pic I took in 2019 of an unidentifiable man buying a fat load of bananas at Whole Foods is funny

xo-xo Gassy Girl

@technicallyrudo I love you, Russell!

Not gonna lie, you guys. Sometimes life is miserable. But I love you guys anyway.

It fucken WIMDY

@technicallyrudo Don’t lie 👀

On boob patrol.

Why is the rockstar’s gf aesthetic so different from the rockstar’s wife aesthetic?? They both need to be just as trashy and covered in leopard print

Can ghosts rip ass??

@technicallyrudo I will appliqué jeans for you any day

I am broke.

Why does Rich Girl go so unnecessarily hard every single time

@CoryJCole This is Rosemary’s Baby erasure (and the other two movies in Polanski’s apartment trilogy: Repulsion and The Tenant)

could be any of us jerry. giddy up