headass

I officially win craziest bitch of the year award I went to another country by myself to get this entire back piece in 2 days LMAO

im going to marry this man so help me god 🥲

I need some water, a gun, and my meds

at the end of the day it’s just you and the person who stares back in the mirror

start living with a man and all of a sudden a radiator now lives in your bedroom

I just have really loud obnoxious nipples

whenever I wake up before the sun and go to the gym I feel like the mitochondria

thinking you are already the best is the quickest way to never be

it’s not racist they are cats

babe lemme chew on your deli parts

I wish my fridge had an ass

hotdogs would be a good coffee shop name

this body is a machine that was built by courage the cowardly dog and a significant amount of substance abuse

I got ratiod by sweatpants boner

how can I enjoy myself in the club when I know there’s a pot roast waiting for me at home

my boyfriend has been home off of tour for 3 days and already has had to go to home depot , pick up furniture from fb market place, and catch a bird that flew into my apartment.. poor guy prolly just wants to relax but!!!I’m just a girl!!!!

there’s gotta be a worm shortage going on

eggs ✅ fertilized dick ✅ jorked shirt ✅ didn’t last long

I love seeing a bad bitch with a total dweeb

who up learning

Did anyone else know brat and brat were the same word