mr so damn lovely and cool

out of the corner of my eye saw this wheelbarrow stood up like a man in my neighbors yard and scared the shit out of me

from across the house i can tell when bae is watching asmr soup slurper whispers into your hair asmr soup slurper tapping candies together, i can hear the sibilants from upstairs

@goredaughter666 never tried it yet

@bartsfate do you ever enter the contests

my job is to drive a car into the mall for a contest to win the car

@johnny_666_ in 8th grade me and my buddy were farting around playing some bullshit like this and his dad came downstairs and turned my amp off and accused us of “musical masturbation” and then he made us sit on the couch and watch a two hour long stevie ray vaughn dvd

Has anyone considered that this might suck?

found out about anti sentimism from youtube ad where a kid was getting bullied at school for his characteristics. wtf not cool right now,this is the problem right now (mmx2 speedrun comes on autoplay) youre supposed to do wheel gator first you dumb dickhole

yea im one of the adult residents of sesame street and i think its totally fine to invite fucking cookie monster to help me with a segment im doing on baked goods

@traff1c_junky instead of cheating there’s a 21 pilot song on the radio now where he says there’s a necromancer outside

new CCJI just dropped ⬇️

@Pops1086 welcome to the force

New member of the Herman Miller gang

@johnny_666_ if his favorite sunch is garden salsa he ran thru

She’s a “Sun Chips” kind of girl

Chinese AI Rodney Dangerfield: watch closely. this man went to the mental health doctor to treat his ailment. The doctor said he was crazy but the man said he wanted a second opinion. The doctor replied in a shocking manner: the doctor told the man he was ugly too

shouting ouch and fuck cause i cut the roof of my mouth on a sharp oat

@johnny_666_ that shit was making me nutt in a good ass way

“One of the best pussies I’ve come across in some time.”

@FranziaMom @jakebrodes well i thought you were my buddy so .

@bartsfate @jakebrodes What. I tweet about it all the fucking time

Feel like these two albums were some of the best of the 2010s. Still hold up.

@jakebrodes the ovlov record is an all timer. just never really heard of anyone who wasn’t one of my buddies liking the oliver houston record

@bartsfate It’s goated man I feel like (and bless his soul I love him) but Oso’s yunahon being released around the same time kinda sucked up all the blog buzz. But they’re my 2 favorite from that era.

me: (whispering) pass the bedtime rock my buddy: (rolling the bball towards me w his feet under the covers)

damn I my life

(kermit the frog voice) my huevos

fire alarm went off and when i went outside chloe finemans publicist was snapping her fingers at me trying to get me to pay attention to chloe fineman