belly

you got some nerve sending me a work email while I'm at work

educated 📚 hoes 🚂 employed 💰 broke ☹️ clean pussy 🤤 stank pussy🤢 loyal 💍 5 kids🤰 faithful 👼🏼 cheaters 😈

@bopuut I’m late but

everyone who is at the game POST PCITURES I need to live vicariously through you.

Being someone’s boss is so weird. My one & only direct report just asked me if she could leave early and I’m like uh yeah??? Idgaf bro do what you want just lmk

pb&j

& as a thank you for hitting 1.5k followers, i’m doing a little giveaway! winner will get one (recreated) frog of their choice as well as some other wild swag! entry ends on 4/10 at 8pm CT ☺️ follow & retweet to enter, open to the US & Canada, 18+ or with parental permission 💗

Hangovers should end after an hour. I get it body, I fucked up. I drank too much. Let's not relitigate the past all day

@kkaprison what about daemon hunt !!

dani is the only one on the team who can actually dress everyone else just looks a mess all the fucking time

wally waiting for his headpats while they fight

The best 2 hours on vacation is rotting in bed w your friend while airdropping pics to each other & asking which pics to post.

ITS INTERNATIONAL BRAD MARCHAND DAY

"THIS IS OUR FUCKING CUP! FUCKING FUCK SAN FRANCISCO"

wild game day!!! :D

how i feel genuinely planning my entire day around the hockey game so i won’t miss it

IM NOT GIVING HARTMAN CREDIT FOR THAT GOAL THAT WAS ZUCCYS GOAL CONGRATS ZUCCY

NHL scheduling be like Friday: -1 Game no one wants to watch Saturday: -800 games all at 7pm. Buckle up.

If she’s pretty that means her dad is bald

When you just did your laundry and now you have all your s-tier clothes back in the closet

ignoring the game it doesnt exist to me anymore. have this cute video of flower trying to have a goalie fight, but they wouldnt let him (again). i love him 🌸❤️

Brock Faber floating to the zynley cup like a pie on a windowsill