Bluebonnet Bar

The First and Best Bonneteer.

Him: “Her hair is falling out. But her hair stunk anyway.” Her: “That’s because your bar stunk.” Him: “Yeah, okay.”

“I do not like sweets or bitches.”

“Is there hand sanitizer in there?” #nmf

Repeat: "There is no Jack Johnson in this bar."

"Budgets get a lot bigger when you're making movies, not throwing birthday parties." #ballin

I need to buy a butter dish.

I should give up pool and take up knitting or something.

"I gotta get that Uber app."

"I put the fuck in Tofurkey."

"I put a children's bible on the curb today."

"Going to see Trick Pony is worse than being a cutter." #cutmybuttintopieces

"It's a $200 fine if you vomit in an Uber car. That's a fact."

#livemusic tonight... Audra and the Whipporwills play at Bluebonnet ( @bonneteering ) Show starts at 10pm.

"You need to bring a girl in and mate them." "My dog? She's a lady." "Then you need to bring a boy in." "She's fixed." "Never mind."

"I got butcher shit."

"I want a god damn blooming onion."

"I think he said 'That's all bullshit'. And he's a Baptist."

Robert Spencer reads, then Poor Ol Uncle Fatty and William Blackart with #livemusic at Bluebonnet ( @bonneteering )

"Do you guys have a bum I could stogie?"