Brew Hefner

“Mum, they attempted to murder me and sexually assaulted me. Infact, they tried to wank my willy off and stuck a finger up my anus and asked if I enjoyed that”

They gotta make flavoured nail varnish

They gotta make flavoured nail varnish

They gotta make flavoured nail varnish

Following the Scott Mills revelations, who out of the ppl below, do you think are most likely to have coerced minors into unlawful sexual activity

@Weldy43 @blondehunx Don’t see a Rolex on her wrist do we.

@blondehunx Youve still some way to go to match our Pat, 15k is pocket change

same person btw

Can I use Klarna to pay for a passport?

Real niggas take 60mg of Adderall to work, and just end up jacking off all day

@Jaack Winston Churchill Robbie Williams Roy Hodgson Robert Peston

UK people… who would be your 4 UK legends on your own personal Mount Rushmore? Here are my four: Bob Mortimer Wayne Mardle Claudia Winkleman Sean Lock

Stephen Mulhern will be next

Just another day closer to my eventual death. Cup of tea.

this gotta be the funniest thing future has ever done

@KITKAT @fightlounge_ Theft of chocolate is unfortunately on the rise

Slippery slope. First you’re getting these from the shop and in a blink you’re addicted to meth.

@samanthaktw Thank you

scouse men are so sexy i just wish that they were good people 🫩

@KITKAT I like KitKats

Regarding recent press coverage

@JamesJMWD Chris Brunt

@brew1hefner Got him and Fernando Amorebieta mixed up

Hugo Rodallega. Some player.

@kjepriv2 Steed Malbranque

@JamesJMWD Morgan Amalfitano

@brew1hefner “One size” Fitz Hall

@JamesJMWD Ron Vlaar

@brew1hefner Pascal Chimbonda

Grant Holt