Nigerian Politician Profile:
Bank — Switzerland
Hospital — London
Holidays — UAE or USA
Kids — UK, USA, Canada
Pilgrimage — Saudi
Shopping — Paris, Milan
Houses — Abuja, Dubai, London
Fornication —Maldives, Mykonos
Checkups — “Routine” trips abroad
Constituency — Seen only during elections
Promises — “We are working on it”
Scandals — “Politically motivated
Side hustle — Government contracts
Cars — Bulletproof convoy, sirens screaming
Light — 24/7 generator (NEPA is for vibes)
Security — More guards than a bank vault
Country — Managed remotely.
But when it’s time to campaign:
“My people… I feel your pain.” 🙂
If you like use your head this coming election or they use it for you as usual.
I need one person that can work for me.
Your role: just be posting in whatsapp group
per day N100
per week 500
Time: Monday to Friday . As time goes on I’ll increase your pay.
@saintxylr@salam_adejoke@yabaleftonline Lol, the cycle will not continue cause it will end with your child, he or she might just be bullied to death. The cycle may continue in hell🙂And I feel you’d be proud.
“I’m so sorry, you won’t be graduating with your mates.”
“I’m sorry, there’s nothing we can do. She has to change departments.”
Those two phrases changed the trajectory of my life.
The journey with UNIMED started with pre degree. I was meant to study MBBS. That was the story I had already told myself about my life. Somewhere along the way, someone said they didn’t think I could handle the pressure, and something in me believed them. So, I chose physiotherapy instead.
I told myself it was still close enough.
First year came with physics and maths. Maths was manageable. Physics, not so much. There was always that fear hanging over us, don’t fail anything, not even one course.
I failed one of the physics courses.
I wish I could explain properly what changed after that, but it wasn’t just school anymore. I started losing interest in things I used to care about. I had serious friendship fallouts, I made choices I probably wouldn’t have made before. My grades dropped. I just felt, disconnected. Like I was watching my own life from somewhere else.
The ironic part is people still called me doctor. I never corrected them.
Then came the extra semester because of a one unit course. Another delay. Another moment of asking myself why things never seemed straightforward for me.
Clearance was hard. Hard in ways I probably would never share. But life kept moving anyway. I started NYSC. I found my way back to writing. I fell in love, I fell out of love. I started a new course. I began working on my menstrual health project. Slowly, life started looking different from the plan I once mourned.
I don’t think my journey looks the way I imagined it would. Maybe it was never supposed to.
I just know that I kept walking.
I’m grateful to God, to my family, and to the very few friends who encouraged me.
I walked.
I’m no doctor.
But I’m still walking.
@iamChigoo This Serah martins is mean!She’s wicked! So just because a despatch rider toasted you you went to go and report him to his management? Now he has been fired! Serah u that u a single mother is doing this? If it was a rich dude that toasted u will u do this? Serah u are evil!
A delivery rider openly told Sarah Martins that he loved her. Instead of simply saying she wasn’t interested or that they weren’t compatible, she went straight to his company to report him which ultimately cost him his job.
What are your thoughts on this matter?
@timmosion It's really funny how everybody is just avoiding the real story narrated by a Christian eyewitness because it doesn't fit what they want to hear.
It will be very hard to fix this country if we continue like this tbh. 💔
🚨 SHE WAS BEATING BY SOME MUSLIM YOUTH PRAYING BECAUSE HER HAIR WAS NOT COVERED.
Victoria David Posted a video narrating how she was lynched on her way by some Muslim youth prayijg because her head was not cover while on a bike.
Some random guy came and said she disrespected them that's why, the she replied this morning explaining how everything happened.
"Firstly, I want to say a big thank you to everyone who called and sent me messages. I truly appreciate it.
I did not post this for public sympathy or attention. I am not even a content creator. I was simply going about my daily business.
On my way to my shop, the road near the central mosque was blocked because of prayers and market traffic, so the bike had to pass another way.
While I was still on the bike, a guy walked up to me and told me to cover my head they didn’t tell me to go back . I told him I am a Christian and you don’t walk up to a stranger and tell her to cover her head That was all I said they are fasting they should come out boldly and say the truth I’m not lying.
I did not slap anyone. I was still sitting on the bike when he slapped me. Before I could even get down properly, another person slapped me too.
Nobody told me to go back. I was not rude. I did not insult anyone.
Some people are saying I slapped him first. That is not true.
I am not lying. God knows the truth
I hope everyone sees this"
@timmosion So you’re pretending you didn’t see the testimony from a Christian eyewitness?
Do you really believe an Igala Muslim would slap an innocent girl simply because she wasn’t covering her hair?
One thing about Igala guys in general is that they don’t tolerate disrespect from a girl.
@Titanium7teen@FadaChristmas_@General_Somto And also I specifically said “beyond the bedbugs” cause the problem now is even beyond that, my point is, bedbugs asides first, vehicles in terrible shapes like this, shouldn’t be on the road.
“It’s Christmas Season. If You’re In Lagos, Please Avoid Public Transport. Book An Online Cab If Can Afford It. There’s a Widespread Infestation Of Bedbugs On Lagos Buses. I’m Creating Awareness So You Don’t Get On a Bus And Go Home With Bedbugs.” - Lady Warns
@Titanium7teen@FadaChristmas_@General_Somto The chairs inside are even more terrible, the interior, also in terrible shape, reason why bedbugs can breed that much without it being noticed, or it might’ve been noticed, but they don’t seem to care, I hope you get it now?
@Titanium7teen@FadaChristmas_@General_Somto Nah I don’t think you get it, what I mean is this, many of these buses in Lagos or most cities are always in very terrible conditions and bad shape, but as long as it moves, these drivers still put them on the road, many of them don’t have headlights or working brakes
@OurFavOnlineDoc At this point it’s becoming a norm, this is very sad and alarming, @NigeriaCAA this definitely needs intervention and regulation, as it is becoming a threat to one’s safety even in the airport
“Imagine Coming Back To Your Own Country, Only To Be Threatened By Beggars At the Lagos Airport. Imagine Your Life Threatened By Beggars. Beggars Who Insist They Want Foreign Currency” -Julie.
WELCOME TO ABEGISTAN.
The country formerly known as Nigeria.