LAAAARRRYYYYY PhD

last year i won this nickelodeon trivia contest and my prize was the pilot script for the show “gibby” that was never released AND NO ONE BELIEVES ME

so is there a Mrs. Guy Who Shot The UnitedHealthcare CEO or

Only times I’m truly patriotic are during the Olympics and when they project the flag onto that big ass stalactite at Meramec Caverns

@kiss_my_hass_ True like okay yeah sure key to the city

being the mayor kinda a looney tunes ass job idk

@clovrVAL Every now and then

someone please give me a ride IM LATE FOR MY SHIFT AT LONG JOHN SILVERS

@ljboolj Woke up to go pee and saw this 💗 nature is healing

I’m dabby the boss dabby Lewinsky dabby the ninja dabby the harajuku barbie like

This, club penguin, and my parents yelling at each other in the background >>>

While you are out having your brat summer, don’t forget your boom clap roots

I have this at work

I know who im voting for this election

A very sandlot summer yup

My psychiatrist in 2012: So it looks like you are really struggling and we do have to put you on the max dosage of anxiety medication My mom: 💔💔💔 Me later that night on my iPod touch: TOP 10 MOST TERRIFYING THEME PARK DEATHS OF ALL TIME (SIX FLAGS EDITION)

@kiss_my_hass_ @mfjoom Love my oomfs interacting

@mfjoom oh no… I’m being enabled

Entering a truly sinister period of my life where I’m convinced I would make a fantastic DJ

I am a rave people hater, dont care bout ur temu body glitter trash music and poly relationship

I hope ours has a Cardinal with a Glock 19 #ForTheLou

this is how it feels to drink a diet coke