Kayla

Anaïs Nin showing her breasts to her psychiatrist so he can reassure her they’re not too small 

birdwatching will have you saying things like "for my next vacation we're choosing between ohio, new jersey, and north dakota"

@PstafarianPrice I used to love shucking corn

I don't have children so I should absolutely NOT be giving unsolicited parenting advice, but, I remember there was this corn grinder at a kids "experience other cultures" thing, and I LOVED it. Just wanted to sit and grind corn. This impulse should be harnessed productively

It’s good to drink sometimes and to intentionally abstain from drinking at other times

@SH2F088 @julie_bush How is it subjective? People should be held to the terms of the contracts they sign

@caryatis @julie_bush I taught my kids fair doesn't exist** This is a good example as to why. It's necessarily subjective Looking back to adjust outcomes is both dangerous, and (apparently) seductive 🫤 **but we should strive for it anyway

this is a nasty misogynistic takedown. dramatically revealing that Belle Burden has huge trusts of approximately $40 million that she will inherit some day does not mean that she did not co-own the hundreds of millions her hedge fund husband made during their marriage. he was a middle class lawyer when they married, she got him the job at her uncle’s hedge fund, she bought both their apartment & house on Martha’s Vineyard and enabled him to amass his huge fortune any way you look at it by caring for their family as a SAHM. he was the one who insisted their prenup carve out what they earned during the marriage to be kept separate — which is highly unusual, especially if the highly educated wife plans to stay at home (which he insisted on). her having trust funds has nothing to do with him having robbed her of half of the hundreds of millions of wealth she helped him build. if their divorce had gone to trial, a jury would have understood that. you’re not entitled to less divorce share because you have trusts prior to the marriage. the smoking gun in all of this is that he walked away from his three kids too. he has wanted little to do with them after leaving besides the occasional dinner. that tells us all we need to know here. newyorker.com/books/page-tur…

@julie_bush Well, i’m convinced now!

@caryatis you are stupid

Reading about a lawsuit that contains the statement that "The Dean's Office has 100% confidence in its fact-finding that..." Wait, 100% confidence? Bullshit. No they didn't. My first impulse is to think about how innumerate lawyers can be, how afraid of ever talking in terms of probability But actually, consider that lawyers live in a world in which saying something constitutes Evidence and therefore saying something can make it so. They are more likely to win this lawsuit if they say (and believe) that they have 100% confidence than if they provided a more realistic and intellectually rigorous assessment

James Frey lied less in A Million Little Pieces than Belle Burden did in Strangers. The finances are, no surprise, eye popping. But what shocking is the emotional core of the book—where her husband was going to take her to trial to get his half of the properties… didn’t happen. The only thing on the court docket was a STATUS CONFERENCE. Plus, she would have been allowed to keep one or both of the houses till her kids turned 18. But turns out… she could have bought him out of the houses anyway. She seems to be worth ~$65M (some yet coming, she’s a beneficiary of 5 trusts, and in one her share is ~$45M, but it’s not like a bank wasn’t gonna loan her money.) She is getting what looks like ~$750k annually PER KID in child support till the kids are 22, plus her husband surrendered their stake in both homes (the one in NYC is worth a cool 12M.) Her husband, it seems worth noting, made his own money. I’ve spent almost two decades think about marriage and money for a living. I also dated one of Belle’s cousins directly prior to my husband, and trusts and prenups had come up. In short, I’ve thought about prenups a lot. If I were marrying someone ultra wealthy I’d ask for exactly what Belle Burden’s husband asked for: the already super wealthy person to fund our life together in whatever way they were accustomed to, and the right to keep what I made separate and take it with me in the event of a divorce. So, with the facts in hand, his request for the prenup where he was able to keep separate funds, looks not just reasonable but wise. In the book Burden depicts her husband’s behavior as being terrible (though not abusive). But it turns out the parts of the book that can be fact checked are riddled with lies, so for me, Burden’s credibility is shot. I always felt that putting your ex-husband in a bestselling memoir where you make him the villain was an ethically dubious choice. (At least make it an auto fictional novel, FFS.) But to do that and LIE? That’s an unhinged, nearly sociopathic, level of revenge. newyorker.com/books/page-tur…

this sort of attitude drives a lot of unnecessary litigation this woman had many millions and still dragged her ex, the father of her children, through the courts to get a few million more. vengeful, destructive, behavior

@emilykmay @EmilyGouldNYmag Don't think I need to. If it's true that she signed a prenup stating she wanted income & investments during the marriage to remain separate, then it's not true that she is "entitled to half of what they built."

@caryatis @EmilyGouldNYmag you don't sound like you've read the book

I don’t particularly care about what “the law” is or what her “actual financial situation” was, Belle Burden is entitled to as much money as she wants from that man, including half of what he made while married to her! just my 2 cents

@emilykmay @EmilyGouldNYmag But the prenup said she wasn’t

@EmilyGouldNYmag THANK YOU. Just because she has money doesn't mean she wouldn't be entitled to half of what they built in a 20 year marriage.

@waltwhitmangoth @helaineolen Because she wanted to protect her multimillion dollar inheritance

@helaineolen this isn't a woman good men bad book. if you read it, she is guilty of placing all her trust in him to a degree that is very stupid. why be a SAHM AND sign a prenup?

I never read Belle Burden's book because it generally takes 2 to make a bad marriage & I hate "women-good, men-bad" memoirs. But count me as stunned that the in-house publishing lawyers didn't at least look at her divorce docs. newyorker.com/books/page-tur…

@SH2F088 I get dizzy if i go too hard on just water

@caryatis Water - just water for me I'm sorta spoiled though, bc my run from my front door is actually a nice hike *so I don't gotta worry about driving there and back*

You guys bad-mouthed the MRE electrolyte beverage powders, but sometimes you need neon yellow in the middle of a long hike

@adesertdryad @FeralPHunter What does this mean

@FeralPHunter no joke i think my marriage improved somewhat after i heard this for the first time and started treating my man like a sex object (lovingly)

the male urge to be desired for the opposite of this

Nothing makes me more overconfident than thinking i’m gonna run out of gas in the middle of nowhere and then finding a station at the last minute. NOTHING CAN TOUCH ME NOW

@Brien_Jackson Isn’t that what the dressing is for?

Omg yes! Salt, fresh pepper, and a drizzle of acid on your salads people!!!!

@joquji5n324il @VB3RG @Aella_Girl If “privilege” means that i get to say no to sex that i expect to be painful and unpleasant 🤷‍♀️

@caryatis @VB3RG @Aella_Girl Well how convenient, another double standard and inequality which women like you are in no rush to get rid of since it benefits you. Can we call it female privilege to expect a world where men's preferences are subordinated to whatever women want?

When people imagine porn has taught men the wrong things for sex, what concrete scenario do they envision? A guy goes home with girl on first date and he tries pounding her too hard doggy style without asking?

@sympatheticopp @HotForMoot So true

@HotForMoot they did the sexiest things a man & a woman can do: she threw away her normal modesty & threw herself at him so he could do whatever he wanted with her, & he exhibited some sexual self-control because he cared about her future

I read the book of Ruth tn and it’s pretty unclear what happened on that threshing room floor between Ruth and boaz. Was it all foot fetish foreplay? Was there PIV? What went on there