Mischa Sitompul

@StayWithGod111 Amen

You asked for a sign from God _and here it is.

I don’t understand tho if he sacrificed all of this but he doesn’t get to see or feel or taste what he sacrificed for, so for what?? We were gonna live in Bali… I thought that was the whole plan… 💔

Hari ini berat banget sih.. a friend of mine sent me this message, and literally I cried like crazy knowing that Dad would do something like this. This seems like his last sacrifice for me and frey 😔🔪💔

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40th day dad and I still can’t believe you’re gone.

It’s almost 40 days from when you left me.. and the heartache still lingers, the tears still remain constant.. I stopped thinking of you every second though, just every minute. The question continues.. Why did you leave me so abruptly?

Tiap kali denger ada papanya siapa meninggal, hati gue slalu ngilu & gue slalu blg dalem hati “kalo itu kejadian ke gue, gila sih sampe daddy meninggoy, 1/2 diri gue ikut sih.. gak deh gak mau bayangin nauzu (sambil ngetok nearest kayu)” now look at me living that nightmare 🔪💔

Days are weird now that you left. There’s a sound in the air that goes silent when you took your last breath. My world feels different. The continuous question of what comes after death.

Begini amat ya jadi y-team anak tunggal.. semua mesti ngurus sendiri, mesti ttd untuk bikin akte kematian, makin harus menyadari bahwa ini adalah kenyataan.

Everyone is moving on except me.

I cannot not talk about this with somebody, but it needs to be somebody that can understand and listen and relate with the situation too, cause I think I’m really losing my mind if I just try and move on with life but my thoughts are suppressed.

I can’t believe I really lost my dad 🔪💔 do you think in Jkt, there’s a community or a space where people can gather and just talk about their grief? Like an AA meeting but for lost souls like me?

And guess what, I am facing the shittiest moment of my entire life! I have never felt a pain like this ever. And I do want anyone to ever feel what I’m currently feeling, it hurts so bad to a point I feel everything and nothing.

I remember, 2 yrs ago I dedicate X as a platform 4 expressing my gratitude towards Unified Field, the Universe, the life I am living, but, u know what? I also feel this is the only safe space I get to write whatever shitty thoughts I have about things I have to go thru in life.

image bokap gue terbaring soulless, just an empty vessel, itu sesuatu yg sampai sekarang masih belum make sense sih buat gue..orang se-energetic, se-gak bisa diem itu bisa no pulse? bisa drop dead?

bangun tidur atau mau tidur, scene yg slalu ada on repeat adalah 22 menit terakhir bokap gue beneran dinyatakan tidak bernyawa. gimana cara ngilangin scene ini ya dari otak gue?