🜏

👹 THIS 👹 PUSSY 👹 DEPRESSED 👹

i'm stressing. i deposited CASH at my wells fargo atm 14 hours ago and it STILL isn't in my account. has anyone else experienced this? @WellsFargo

what i knew about pregnancy and what i thought would never happen to me: weak enamel. half of my molar is gone 😭😭😭

how is waba grill gonna send me a coupon valid only on 5/5 when today is 5/7?!?? 🫩🫩😭😭😭

in my ice eating stage of pregnancy ughhhhhh so good

i miss my cool mint geek bar 😞

he has no business being this fine.

the first 29 weeks of my pregnancy, i was enjoying spice and citrus with no issue, had no weight gain, was living life. but once 30 weeks hit (i'm 31 weeks now), BOOM 💥 7lb weight gain and severe heartburn from just the sight of a pizza 🫩

*getting ready to pay for my oil change* Mechanic: we also noticed tha- Me:

When I click "Start free trial" and they're asking for my credit card details

When someone who's not my manager tries to tell me what to do at work

i just want a damn redbull 🫩

how can i get rich in one day so i can quit my job

“we’ve decided to move forward with other candidates”

"I have to wake up early tomorrow" Me at 3am wondering how people even started translating languages if they didn't understand each other

my mouth just watered at the thought of an angry orchard

i don't understand why ppl knock on a public restroom when the DOOR IS LOCKED ?!!

Chappell would’ve shot her 😭

i felt so unloved today

i’m so old i used to tweet by texting twitter’s number